How beautiful is it to eat? Etiquette: rules of behavior at the table. How to use cutlery. Rules of behavior at the table while eating Basic rules of table etiquette in brief

Young parents do not always take seriously the advice of their elders in raising children, and they consider teaching their child table manners a top priority. So in some families it comes down to completely unpedagogical shouting: “don’t slurp, close your mouth and chew, sit up straight, don’t rock in your chair, don’t grab from the table until lunch...”. At this point they consider their mission completed. And the grandmother knows for sure that in a few years the parents will have to blush for such a teenager. Or another situation, the baby has been poking around in the soup for half an hour, choosing from there what he likes best, and eventually pushing the plate away, spilling the contents on the floor, on the table and on himself... Is this a familiar situation? It is forgivable if the child is only a year old. What if it’s already four or five? Where is the line between childish awkwardness and lack of good manners? And when should you start introducing your child to the basics of etiquette? Let's figure out what the rules of behavior for children at the table should be.

Everyone has a few unpleasant moments in their memory when a neighbor’s teenager or a kid invited to a children’s party simply ruined lunch with their behavior. They talked loudly, reached across the table for the best piece of cake, slurped, or even choked, without chewing their food. The list of unacceptable behaviors is endless.

Let's protect ourselves from similar behavior from our son or daughter in the future. Let's try to systematize teaching our little ones good manners so that it is not burdensome for them or for us. The best age to start training is 1.5 - 2 years. Naturally, at this age a child will not be able to understand all the rules of adult etiquette. Yes, this is not necessary.

When to teach? Everything has its time

Table etiquette rules for children are slightly different from adult etiquette, because... Many hyperactive children become little pranksters while eating. Most children learn good manners by the age of 5. But a child’s education should begin at the age of 1.5–2 years. Of course, there may be exceptions to the rules, but know that the later you start training, the more difficult your lessons will be for your child.

We read an article about how to teach a child to eat independently and carefully -

from 1.5 to 5

  • At this age, the child actively masters the skills of the surrounding world. He absorbs everything he sees and tries to imitate adults. It's time to learn the basics of etiquette in a playful way;
  • It is mandatory to wash your hands before eating. The mother herself should not forget to wash her hands before feeding the baby. Before each meal, she and the baby should go to the bathroom and wash both her and his hands. Over time it will do this automatically;
  • Feeding a child should definitely take place at the dinner table, and not in the nursery or in front of the TV. This will help your child take food seriously in the future and respect the work of those who prepare food. Place your baby in a high chair so that he does not look out from under the table, but feels like an equal member of the family;
  • Place a linen napkin on your baby's lap. Clothes will remain clean even if your child spills soup or tea. In adult life, the presence of a napkin in a restaurant will not confuse your child;
  • Do not allow your child to play with food, crumble bread, or spread porridge on the table. Such behavior is not permissible even at 2 years old. Try to patiently explain to the baby that it is ugly to behave this way, that the mother is ashamed of him. Mom and Dad never behave like that. Of course, the baby will not listen to you the first time;
  • Just one rule: never yell at him. Be patient and consistent in your demands. You cannot prohibit something today and tomorrow not notice what a child has done;
  • By the age of five, children should already be able to handle a fork and knife as children. They should not be confused that the knife should be held in the right hand and the fork in the left hand. By this age, you need to teach your child which foods are eaten using cutlery and which foods are taken with their hands.

from 5 to 10

The most fruitful age for education, but also the most difficult. During this period, the child does not so unconditionally trust the words of his parents. He is already trying to independently understand the life and actions of the people around him.

Mom and dad should not allow any relaxation for themselves in the ritual of eating. If you teach your child not to drink juice from a package, but to pour it into a glass, it will be unacceptable to break this rule yourself. Or just forget to wash your hands before lunch one day. Or not thanking the hostess for dinner. The child will notice this, and your words will no longer be true for him.

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Note to moms!


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At 5-6 years old, the child must learn how to behave at the table and no longer violate accepted norms. Each violation must be discussed with the child at a family council. This will help him understand the seriousness of the adults' demands. But in no case should you conduct a “debriefing” in the presence of strangers, in a derogatory manner or with the help of shouting and swearing.

  • The baby already knows that he needs to sit upright at the dining table, without swaying in his chair. It is unacceptable to spread your elbows and push your neighbors at the table with them. If it is difficult to achieve compliance with this rule with words, the technique with books helps a lot. During lunch, slip a book under your child's armpit and ask them to hold it until the end of the meal. A few of these exercises and there will be no problems with your elbows;
  • The child does not allow himself to slurp loudly or speak with his mouth full. This was constantly instilled in him. He also knows that he needs to put small pieces of food in his mouth and chew them thoroughly;
  • The baby is holding back belching and coughing. If this is not possible, be sure to turn away from the table and cover your mouth with a paper napkin;
  • It will be completely natural for a child under 10 years of age to know that one cannot consider oneself the center of society and attract everyone’s attention to one’s person with various loud demands. If the child needs to move away from the table, he must ask permission from one of the parents in a quiet voice, calmly. It is not at all necessary for everyone to know that he wants to go to the toilet;
  • You cannot reach across all the dishes to the plate at the other end of the table. The child knows that he needs to ask for the desired piece to be put on his plate. You can't rummage through a shared dish in search of the best piece;
  • You can sit down at the table only after adults, and get up after everyone has eaten. If you don’t want to sit and listen to adults talk, the child simply asks permission to leave;
  • Gratitude for lunch must necessarily manifest itself in the form of the magic word “thank you.”

from 10 and older

You did a good job teaching your offspring excellent manners and etiquette. However, it is too early to relax. He knows what every intelligent person should know and observe. But the rules of good manners and behavior at the table are not limited to this. Ahead is the study of special cutlery that is not used daily. It would be good to introduce your child to how to eat various exotic dishes. General knowledge about the food traditions of the peoples of the world will not be superfluous.

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  1. Do not speak to your child in a didactic tone. To better understand the rules of etiquette, a game form of training is suitable. You can create a dinner party for dolls and bears by setting the table with toy dishes according to all adult standards. Your child will, of course, be responsible for this lunch. And you will only prompt and advise in time.
  2. Be consistent and patient in your learning. Don't allow yourself to take it out on your child, even if he has done something inappropriate. Don't forget to praise and support your child for his successes.
  3. Involve your child in preparing lunch. Trust him to arrange the plates and bring the bread to the table. Working together will bring you closer and make your child more respectful towards food and the person preparing lunch.
  4. Call on cartoons and fairy tales that talk about the rules of etiquette to help you. Discuss with your child a scene from a related movie you just saw. Don't miss real-life examples. The rules of behavior at the table should be vividly woven into reality; this is not a frozen dogma.
  5. Your own example is the best lesson. Children always imitate adults. Let's use this for learning. Of course, it’s not easy to always control yourself and not allow yourself to grab a piece of tasty food on the fly, but remember about the child.

Why should a child be taught etiquette?

Your efforts will not be in vain. Adult life will very soon become the life of your baby. A joint lunch with a potential employer, a visit to a restaurant with a girl you like, a business dinner with partners, a corporate party... Often the most serious conversations take place at the dinner table. Read the article with comments and experiments

Video minute: table etiquette

Psychologists say that it is necessary to teach a child the rules of etiquette at the table from early childhood: from one to two years:

How to sit at the table correctly

Lessons in good manners. How to behave at the table? How to sit, what you can and shouldn't do at the table? In good manners lessons you will learn:

How Koksik and Shunya learned table manners

Even the smallest representative of our society knows that he “should behave” in a certain manner at the table. What can and cannot be done while eating is laid down by parents in early childhood. Rules of behavior at the table for children begin with playing “like adults”, gradually moving meals to regular moments, and becoming the norm of behavior.

Table etiquette– this is not only a cultural coloring of the eating process. By observing the rules of table manners, the main life tasks are solved:

  1. Digestion improves;
  2. The admission process becomes easier;
  3. Hygiene rules are observed;
  4. Preventing accidents at the table.

History and culture of food

The rules of behavior at the table probably appeared before the table itself. They were not invented by the communists in their unique organization of schools and kindergartens. The first mentions of table etiquette appeared in the ancient world. There is mention of this in the texts of the ancient Sumerians. They say that a person must be highly moral and comply with ethical standards- this is what is given to man by the gods and distinguishes people from animals. Failure to comply with the rules of behavior, according to the ancient Sumerians, leads to negativity in his life.

Eating is the most important process. He was always surrounded by all sorts of rituals and rules, strictly regulating who, when, where, what he eats. The first rules were inseparably connected with the family hierarchy, the organization of everyday life, the method of cooking, and even with the food itself. Breaking the rules while eating was considered something unforgivable, shameful, and was condemned (and sometimes punished) at all times, in any culture. Life and a person’s way of life changed, and the rules changed along with it. Family rituals have been displaced and given way to food culture and aesthetics. Table manners are increasingly based on secular ethics, rather than on religious and national traditions.

Why do we need table rules?

Compliance with rules and etiquette at the table is not the prerogative of a certain social group of people. It has nothing to do with the level of income or social status of the family. " We are from simple people, from workers. Why do we need all these tablecloths, napkins, forks and knives? Why does my child need all this?“Kindergarten teachers sometimes hear something similar. It is important to understand that the culture of nutrition and behavior is not whims, not the desire to “show off” in front of others. The fact is that following certain rules of etiquette at the table makes sense and has specific benefits for children. Let's look at some of them:

  1. Washing your hands before eating protects the body from pathogenic bacteria entering with food;
  2. Setting the table using a clean tablecloth and disposable napkins protects food from coming into contact with the surface of the dining table;
  3. The requirement to “not fidget” and not talk while eating is to prevent serious incidents at the table (the child may choke);
  4. The request to “take your time,” sit up straight and chew your food thoroughly is nothing more than helping the stomach digest what you eat quickly and easily;
  5. A napkin placed on your knee (or chest) will protect your clothes from getting dirty.

I would especially like to highlight the use of special cutlery during meals. Many still believe that this is nothing more than deliberate behavior of the upper class, in order to show their skills and knowledge in this area. It's not like that at all. To use devices skillfully, you do not need to be a representative of a certain group. The use of devices is intended not to exhaust, but to facilitate the actions of the eater. It is much more convenient to eat meat by cutting it into pieces (rather than biting whole with a fork), it is convenient to cut fish with a special fork, and eat dessert with a small spoon or fork. It's true?

Rules for table manners in kindergarten

The issue of organizing children's nutrition in a preschool educational institution is an important task that the kindergarten team solves in its multifaceted approach. Proper healthy nutrition for preschoolers is accompanied by its proper organization. For young children, everything is like an adult: a set table that is aesthetically attractive, and, of course, the rules of behavior for children at the table. This is easy to understand, in a group of 20 to 35 people, a dinner organized without rules of behavior and discipline would turn into chaos with a high degree of risk to the health (life) of children. But this doesn't happen. The study of rules of behavior and norms of etiquette in preschool educational institutions does not occur from case to case, but in the process of all regime moments. Eating is the most important moment; there is a special approach to it. Both parents and children themselves understand this.

The task of instilling table manners among preschoolers is clearly formulated in preschool educational programs, taking into account the age characteristics of the groups.

Age groupTasks for developing a culture of nutrition and behavior at the table (hygienic skills)
1st junior group
(2-3 years)
1. Strengthen the ability to wash your hands, face, dry with a towel
2. Chew your food thoroughly
3. Hold the spoon in your right hand (exception for left-handers)
4. Use a napkin
5. Give thanks after finishing a meal (say “thank you”)
6. Know short poems and nursery rhymes about food
2nd junior group
(3-4 years)
1. Hygiene skills (wash your face yourself with soap, dry yourself with a towel)
2. The ability not to crumble bread
3. Use cutlery
4. Chew food with your mouth closed
5. Do not talk while chewing food
6. Behave calmly and say thank you after finishing a meal
Middle group
(4-5 years)
1. Take food little by little and chew well
2. Get acquainted with cutlery (knife, fork)
3. Eat quietly, use a napkin
4. Develop a positive attitude towards the rules and culture of food
5. Understanding that others approve of “correct” behavior at the table, and condemn the manifestation of sloppiness and bad behavior
Senior group
(5-6 years)
1. Strengthen the ability to use cutlery (fork, knife, spoon)
2. Eat quietly
3. Maintain correct posture while eating
4. After eating, move your chair in and thank the adults.
5. Help with table setting
Preparatory group
6-7 years)
1. Consolidate all previously acquired skills and abilities
2. Sit in the correct position, maintaining posture, without putting your elbows on the table
3. Use a fork and knife correctly
4. Using a napkin during and after meals
5. Participate in setting the table, clearing dishes after meals
6. Thank adults

Memo “Rules of behavior at the table for older preschoolers”

  1. Sit up straight, don’t “fall apart”;
  2. Feet together, do not cross your legs;
  3. Don't shuffle your feet;
  4. Don't talk while eating;
  5. Don't twist or push;
  6. Eat and don’t get dirty, don’t spill food on the tablecloth;
  7. Don’t bite off big pieces – eat slowly;
  8. Eat with your mouth closed, do not slurp;
  9. Hold your spoon, fork and knife correctly;
  10. Don't crumble the bread, bite it over your plate;
  11. Bend over the spoon, do not bring it to your mouth;
  12. When you drink, raise the cup to your mouth;
  13. After eating, put the cutlery on the table;
  14. When you get up from the table, pull up your chair and thank the adults.

School table manners

Of course, school is not a kindergarten. Its main function, after all, is educational, and educational is only secondary. Children are at school only half the day, but at school children also eat. Meals for schoolchildren are provided in the school canteen. The children all eat together, and the time allotted for food is quite short - only 15-20 minutes. Therefore, compliance with the rules of behavior at the table is mandatory.

Rules of behavior in the school canteen

  1. Don't run. You must walk to and from the dining room at a normal pace so as not to become a victim or cause of painful injury;
  2. Wash your hands before eating;
  3. Don’t rush to take a seat, don’t push your comrades out of the way;
  4. Maintain the order;
  5. Walk calmly around the dining room, watch your step so as not to slip;
  6. Do not swing your arms if you are holding instruments in them;
  7. Do not talk while eating, eat with your mouth closed;
  8. Use cutlery correctly. Remember what is eaten with a spoon and what is eaten with a fork and knife;
  9. Use napkins;
  10. Don’t drop food on the floor, and if you drop it, pick it up;
  11. Don’t speak badly about the dishes – respect the work of the cooks;
  12. After eating, put away your dishes;
  13. Be polite and thank the cafeteria workers.

It is important to remember that children do not learn table manners from books or instructions, but rather learn from their parents. Do you want your child to have an idea about proper nutrition and its organization? Means, pay attention to how the table is organized in your family? Cover the table with a tablecloth, no need to wait for special occasions. Use beautiful cutlery, be nice to each other at the table. Get together more often - it greatly strengthens the family and creates an atmosphere of trust. Let these little things become the norm in your home. Add your own special family rituals that your now-adult children will proudly bring into their future families as heirlooms that keep you all together.

Etiquette lessons are useful at any age. Adults know the basic rules, but forget about the little things.

These little things reveal their lack of table education. Children do not have any knowledge of the rules of etiquette; skills should be instilled at an early age.

The sooner you accustom your child to generally accepted rules, the sooner he will master them. His behavior at guests and at school feasts will be impeccable. Do you want to be proud of your child?

Give him some home training in good manners. You will have a lot of fun and give your child knowledge. If he perceives everything as a prank, it’s okay. During the feast, he will remember your lessons.

Parents will also benefit, as they will be able to refresh their knowledge and acquire the skills of aesthetic behavior at the table: in a company, at a party, at a romantic dinner.

During the time of tsarist rule in Rus', it was customary to eat all dishes with a spoon. Everyone did this: from peasants to boyars and royalty. The fork was brought to us only at the beginning of the 17th century from Poland.

This instrument was not accepted by the superstitious Russian people for a long time. Many signs and beliefs were associated with her.

Today the table is set according to etiquette: a spoon, two forks and two knives. Other devices are added as needed. Learn the rules for using cutlery.

Rules for using cutlery:

Rules Explanations
1 Use a fork if serving spaghetti The fork should be taken in the right hand. Use a spoon to help cut the spaghetti into portions that will fit in your mouth.
2 Not all dishes require the use of a knife It is not needed when breaking cutlets, cabbage rolls, or omelettes into pieces
3 Instruments on the left should be held in the left hand And those on the right are in the right
4 The knife serves as an auxiliary tool The main tool is a fork, use it carefully, keep it away from the base of the tines
5 The fish should be cut into pieces with a knife The next piece is cut after the previous one has been chewed.
6 There are special utensils for chilled dishes: a knife and a fork. They're called snack bars
7 Fruits are eaten with a fruit knife and fork Do not confuse with cocktail and snack utensils!
8 When taking a break from eating, the cutlery is placed on the plate as it was originally held. Fork - handle to the left, knife - to the right
9 When the meal is finished, the knife and fork should be placed on the plate together A knife and fork lying together is a sign for the waiter that it is time to take away the dishes or change cutlery and dishes
10 Hot fish is eaten with special utensils The knife has a blunt beveled end, and the fork is easily recognizable by its four teeth
11 A teaspoon is used when the tea needs to be stirred After stirring, remove the spoon
12 Jacket potatoes are peeled using a knife Vegetables are eaten with a fork. When the knife is not used, the fork is held in the right hand

Host a training dinner at home and let family members demonstrate skills. Memorize all 12 points of the table and rehearse.

Self-confidence requires acquiring skills. Everything should happen arbitrarily, spontaneously. This skill comes with experience.

Table etiquette for children and adults

For people of any age, there are approximately the same rules with minor differences. Remember them, teach your child good manners.

The sooner you start the learning process, the sooner your child will begin to delight you at a party and surprise those around him with his gallantry and ability to behave.

Table manners:

  • Wash your hands before sitting down at the table.
  • Young family members are always seated at the table. The child should sit on a special children's chair and feel equal to everyone else.
  • You can't leave your elbows on the table.
  • You can't talk at the table with your mouth full.
  • Belching and coughing should be controlled.
  • Ask to pass the dishes at the other end of the table rather than reaching for it yourself.
  • Be sure to thank the hostess for the delicious dinner.
  • The child must ask permission before leaving the table, or wait until everyone has eaten and left.
  • Don't let children talk with their mouths full.

Eating according to all the rules of etiquette

  • Use special devices. Each dish has its own.
  • Do not pick up a fallen plug, but ask that the appliance be replaced.
  • Sit at a table with your back straight. When you eat, you are allowed to tilt your body forward a little for convenience.
  • Do not spread the pate on the bread; it is eaten separately.
  • During a meal, hands should not touch the table.
  • It is correct to take the first courses, scooping them with a spoon away from you.
  • First, the liquid is eaten from the soup, and then the meatballs and other thick stuff are dealt with.
  • Do not cool the dish: do not blow on it or stir with a spoon. Wait.
  • It is customary to drink champagne immediately, before meals.
  • Drink liquids in small sips.
  • Soup or broth served in a cup should be drunk over the top. A spoon is used to scoop out large particles of grounds.
  • You can only eat crayfish, chicken tobacco and asparagus with your hands. For other dishes, use cutlery. A container of water and a napkin are needed to rinse your fingers.
  • Fruits are cut and eaten with a fork.
  • It is customary to stir tea silently so as not to distract guests from the meal with sound.
  • Preparing a sandwich: the bread should be on a platter during the procedure. Spread the butter with a knife, holding the piece with a fork. Top with cheese or ham. After this, separate portions and eat.
  • When you finish eating, touch your lips with a napkin.

Rules of etiquette are general norms of behavior at the table that should be followed. Remember them, practice eating according to all the rules.

This will make you feel confident at any event.

Important! Whatever happens during the feast - you cough, a piece of meat falls off your fork, or spills wine on yourself - don’t worry.

It happens to everyone. Act confidently, as if it was planned this way. A confident appearance is the key to the success of any event.

Smile, chat, eat food. Be natural and relaxed.

Useful video

It wouldn't hurt for each of us to brush up on the rules of table etiquette, and perhaps even learn something new about how to behave while eating. The most important rules of etiquette that absolutely everyone should use.

Each of us notices when in a cafe at the next table someone eats sloppily or secretly wipes their hands on their knees. In the same way, other people notice our mistakes; any behavior is striking and can cause embarrassment. Therefore, it is better to check yourself and correct your own behavior if necessary.

General rules apply to any situation; they will never be superfluous. The first thing we pay attention to when we see a person is his posture. Posture characterizes not only a person’s behavior or state, but also reveals the secrets of his character.

An insecure person will fidget nervously on the edge of his chair, a complex person will try to slouch in order to become less noticeable. Sit upright, but so that you are comfortable. Your hands can be placed on the edge of the table or on your knees, and it is better to press your elbows to your sides.

By the way, in order to learn how to hold your elbows near your body, in Soviet times it was advised to periodically train - have lunch, holding a couple of weighty books with your elbows. This is necessary so that the correct bodily pattern is formed, and you hold your elbows flawlessly even when you don’t think about it at all.

The rules of table etiquette cover almost all situations that can happen to a person and give a clear recommendation on what to do in a given situation.

Naturally, table etiquette at home and restaurant etiquette are somewhat different. However, there are rules that are appropriate in any situation:

  • Don't talk too loudly;
  • Do not move the fork or spoon with food too far from your mouth;
  • You should not make sounds while eating;
  • You should eat calmly, without unnecessary haste.

Restaurant

The rules of behavior in a restaurant imply some composure - you need to behave correctly and with dignity in order to make a pleasant impression on others.

  1. The man must let the lady go first, but if a group of men or women goes to the restaurant, then everyone is on equal terms or relies on the initiator of the dinner.
  2. If several people are supposed to meet at dinner, and some of them are late, then by mutual agreement with the rest of the guests, you can wait about a quarter of an hour for the latecomers. Waiting longer is a sign of disrespect for guests who arrive on time.
  3. If you happen to be late, you should apologize and then simply join the others. You should not draw special attention to the fact of being late and explain the reason, just join in the table conversation.
  4. When a man and a woman meet in a restaurant, the man must read the menu and offer his companion some dishes. For a girl in this case to express her indifference is a sign of bad manners. Etiquette in a restaurant implies the participation of the lady in choosing dishes.
  5. In a restaurant, you should not have a conversation in a raised voice or laugh loudly. If this happened by accident, it makes sense to apologize to other visitors and be quieter. Observe table etiquette, and if someone behaves inappropriately at the next table, you should inform the waiter about it.
  6. You need to start eating when the waiter has brought out the ordered dishes to everyone present. If the person who is waiting for his dish to be prepared does not mind, he can make an invitation to others to start eating.
  7. It is strictly forbidden to perform hygiene procedures at the table - wiping your face, neck and hands with napkins, combing your hair or applying lipstick. If you need to pay attention to your appearance, it is better to do this in a special room. Table etiquette also does not welcome traces of lipstick on dishes. Before starting to eat, the girl must carefully remove the lipstick with a napkin.
  8. Any interaction with food also looks uncivilized - food is on the table to be eaten. Taking photos for Instagram, blowing on the soup, meticulously picking at the salad, commenting on the ingredients is indecent.
  9. If you come across a piece of cartilage or a bone in some dish, you need to carefully return the inedible element back to the spoon and move it to a plate (or napkin).









How to handle devices

  1. Under no circumstances should you check the cleanliness of the cutlery, and if you do notice a cloudy spot on a fork or spoon, you need to quietly draw the waiter’s attention to this oversight and politely ask for a replacement.
  2. In most restaurants, the table is set in advance, and the cutlery is laid out on both sides of the serving plate.
  3. Don’t be confused if there are more dishes on the table than you expected to see - everything has its purpose, and if you are in doubt about which fork or spoon you should take, you can always see how the other guests solve this problem.
  4. Those utensils that lie to the left of the plate are used with the left hand, and those that are laid out to the right must be held in the right hand.
  5. When serving complex dishes, each dish requires its own utensils, so if you are in doubt about which fork to take, take the farthest one - the one that is furthest from the edge of the plate. As you change dishes, you will gradually move closer to the closest appliances.
  6. The knife is used either for cutting food or for spreading pates and butter (for example, during breakfasts). You should not try pieces from a knife.
  7. Meat or fish should be cut sequentially as it is eaten. Cutting the entire portion at once is bad form. It is generally accepted that this way the dish cools down faster and loses its main flavor nuances.

Learn in advance a few differences between different cutlery so as not to get into trouble.






Forks

  • Second hot dishes are eaten with a table fork; it has four teeth, and its length is slightly less than the diameter of the plate and is placed on the left;
  • a fish fork is used for hot fish dishes, it looks smaller than a diner and has four short teeth, a fish fork is easily recognized by its indentations - they are needed to separate the bones;
  • snack fork - a smaller duplicate of a table fork, used to eat cold appetizers;
  • dessert fork - for pies, small, matches the size of the dessert plate and looks atypical;
  • a fruit fork equipped with two prongs, usually served with a fruit knife;
  • the remaining forks are considered auxiliary, they are placed next to the dish that needs to be eaten with them.

Knives

  • Any second hot dish is eaten with a table knife, it is placed to the right of the plate, the blade is turned towards the plate;
  • a fish knife is dull and resembles a spatula, used to separate the flesh of fish from the bones;
  • the snack knife is small and has serrations;
  • the dessert and fruit knife look similar - they are the smallest.

Spoons

  • tablespoon - the largest, lies to the right of the plate;
  • a dessert spoon is served with desserts that do not require cutting - soft puddings, jellies and whipped cream;
  • an ice cream spoon is served with a bowl;
  • the cocktail spoon has a very narrow and long handle;
  • a teaspoon can be served with any hot drink;
  • coffee spoon is the smallest, served only with black coffee.

Dialogues and behavior at the table

Table etiquette involves not only the use of cutlery, correct positioning and good posture, but also the manner of conducting dialogues and conversations.

It is worth noting that table etiquette strictly prohibits discussing provocative issues that could lead to a serious conflict - therefore, you should refrain from comments about money, politics and religion.

How to behave at the table and what to say? Be sure to look at the person who is speaking to you, listen without interrupting, and only then respond. If you consider some of your interlocutor’s questions inappropriate for a meal, gently suggest discussing this a little later. In all other cases, you should answer easily and naturally.

The restaurant also does not imply heated arguments - refrain from inappropriate comments and lighten the mood with a sweet joke if someone else raises their voice.

You shouldn’t have a conversation with just the two of you; involve the rest of the meal participants in the conversation.. For example, if the conversation is about a recent vacation, you can ask one of the interlocutors whether he is going to go on vacation in the near future or what vacation spots he prefers.

It is also good form in any table conversation to praise the host, cook or initiator of the meeting - find a few kind words to note the general atmosphere of the evening.







A short course in etiquette

  • Do as the majority does.
  • Don't point out others' mistakes, as a last resort, you can say this quietly in an undertone and only to your neighbor at the table.
  • Don't be away from your meal for too long.
  • When leaving the table, apologize.
  • Try everything and eat what you like.
  • Diets, eating disorders, restrictions on alcoholic beverages and diet are not discussed at a common table.

It is better to study some rules of behavior at the table by looking at pictures - look at the basic table setting diagrams, you can also watch a video on how to properly hold this or that device.

Table etiquette is not that difficult if you put a little time into it, and following all the rules will help you present your best self.

We eat beautifully and correctly

Everyone knows that knowing and following table manners is extremely important because ethical table behavior helps us feel confident and comfortable.

Inability to use a knife and fork should not deprive us of the pleasure of spending time in a fine restaurant. We present to your attention a number of basic rules of conduct in restaurants and in refined society in general.

In the restaurant: menu selection, ordering, tips

You can straighten your hair near the mirror before entering the restaurant hall, but you cannot comb your hair or touch up your hair - this is done in the ladies' room. A man enters the hall first.

In the wardrobe, leave a coat, an umbrella, bags, a case with documents (if you are not having a business meeting), but not a handbag.

It’s acceptable to arrange a meeting on the street if you don’t like going into a restaurant alone. But according to the rules, the one who invites comes earlier and waits at the table.

The man orders the food and chooses the wine. True, he can consult with you and ask about your wishes. A man communicates with the service staff - head waiter, waiter and sommelier.

If you have invited a business partner to lunch, it is better to place and pay for the order in advance. They don't talk about business until the dishes and drinks have been chosen.

The person who invited pays the bill, even if it is a business lunch and the invitee is a man.

If a large group is dining, everyone pays for themselves, while the husband always pays for his wife.

Taboo. It is unacceptable to knock with a spoon when calling the waiter. You cannot demand the bill when your partner is finishing her coffee - even if you are in a hurry. It is not polite.

NB! In a restaurant, do not pull up a chair yourself - wait until your companion or head waiter does it. Stand calmly, without bending your legs or looking back.

If you are in a restaurant with a group and have invited a friend to join, introduce him to everyone present.

In restaurants, it is customary to leave a tip of 10% of the order value in addition to the amount indicated on the bill. In Ukraine (in all high-class restaurants) and Germany, the cost of service is included in the bill, and you can limit yourself to the amount indicated on it.

There is an unspoken rule: tips are left in banknotes. It is permissible to check the invoice for “errors”. And if you are unhappy with the service, you don’t have to leave a tip.

Code of Conduct

You need to sit at the table at a comfortable distance - not too close, but not too far - the distance should not exceed the width of your palm.

Under no circumstances should you place your elbows on the table; only your wrists can be placed on the table for a short time. However, women are allowed to lean their elbows slightly on the table if necessary.

When you use cutlery, your hands should not touch the table at all. While eating, if you have one hand free, do not keep it under the table - this is bad manners.
You should always sit upright on a chair, you can only bend slightly over the plate while eating. You need to sit at the table straight, but at the same time freely, so as not to create the impression that you are uncomfortable or uncomfortable.

A personal linen napkin should be placed on your lap. You should not wipe your lips and hands with it while eating. To do this, there should be paper napkins on the table.
After you have finished eating, you can lightly touch your lips with a linen napkin and wipe your fingertips.

If women wear lipstick, they should only use paper napkins.

Naturally, under no circumstances should you use any napkins at the table as a handkerchief. When you finish your meal, simply place your napkin on the table.

Even if you are very hungry, you need to eat slowly and quietly. Chew with your mouth closed and never chew or blow on food to cool it.

Don't talk while eating.

Don't insist on choosing dishes for your tablemates.

Even if the dish was very tasty, you should not wipe the bottom of the plate with a piece of bread.

At a large table, all common dishes should have their own utensils, for example, special forks, spoons or tweezers. With these utensils, not personal ones, you need to take and put food from common dishes on your plate. Under no circumstances use individual utensils to take food from a common dish.

If the desired dish or, say, a salt shaker is located at a great distance from you, do not reach across the table for it. Ask a neighbor or waiter to serve them to you.

If you need to temporarily interrupt your meal, then place the knife and fork on the plate the way you held them: the knife with the handle to the right, the fork with the handle to the left.

If you have completely finished your meal, arrange the cutlery as follows: the knife and fork lie next to each other, parallel to each other, and the handles of both items point to the right. This means that you have completed your dinner (lunch, breakfast, lunch), and the plate can be taken away.

If you're full, you don't have to finish the dish. This rule also applies to alcoholic beverages.

Table etiquette

Bread

Bread is eaten in pieces, which are broken off from a large piece taken. It is not customary to bite directly from this piece.

By the way, people take bread with their hands. Use the same method for cakes, cookies and fruits. Sugar cubes are also taken by hand or with special tongs if they are lying nearby.

In case you want to butter the bread, gradually break off small pieces, press them onto the plate with your fingers and spread with butter. By the way, butter and pate are taken with common utensils from common dishes and placed on your plate and only after that spread on bread. Caviar can be immediately spread on bread.

Buttered bread should not be cut with a knife.

If there is a small bread plate near you, then the bread must be transferred from the common plate to it. This is exactly what it is intended for. The butter is also placed with a clean knife on the edge on the same plate. They do the same with caviar, but for the caviar they use a small spatula instead of a knife.

Sandwiches served before the feast are eaten with hands, and at the table - with a fork and knife.

Sometimes a buffet sandwich is multi-layered and falls apart in your hands and does not fit in your mouth. Such a sandwich should be placed on a plate and use a knife and fork (if there are no utensils, use paper napkins).

Meat

Pork and lamb chops, fillets, steaks, liver and other similar dishes are eaten using a table knife and fork: gradually cut off small pieces without cutting everything at once. In this case, the knife is in the right hand and the fork is in the left. When cutting a dish, the fork should not be held perpendicularly, but only at an angle to the plate.

Meatballs, cabbage rolls, omelettes, cutlets, and other soft dishes that do not require the use of a knife are eaten with a fork, which is held with the right hand, helping oneself with the knife. But it is not customary to cut food with a knife.

Remove the kebab from the skewer with a fork or the blunt side of a knife.

The sauce is poured over the meat, not the side dish.

Pierce the Kiev cutlet at the bone to allow the oil to flow out, and cut off one piece at a time. Attention: do not pick it up by the bone or hair curler!

The bird is eaten with a knife and fork. It is not necessary to completely cut off all the seeds. At home, you can allow yourself to take a chicken leg in your hand.

Meat with vegetables. There are conflicting recommendations on how to eat such a dish. According to the first, the meat should be cut into small pieces and put the knife aside. According to the second, you must not let go of the knife from your right hand or the fork from your left hand for a minute. Americans are guided by the first rule. In the European sense, this method is far from elegant. Following the second recommendation, it would be correct to cut off a piece of meat, holding it with a fork. Mashed potatoes are placed on a cut piece of meat, pricked on a fork.

If you serve meat with peas or other vegetables that are difficult to hold on a fork, then you can do this: hold the meat with a fork, cut off a piece, then turn the fork with this piece and put the vegetables in it; vegetables can be placed on the cut pieces of meat, as much as can be held.
When the meat is finished, holding the fork in your right hand, finish the peas (do not put the peas on the fork, but pick them up like on a spatula).

If the potatoes are served whole, they should not be squashed on the plate.

The salad, served with the meat on a separate plate, should be eaten from the same plate, taking a little in order with what is on the main plate.

Fish

Fish is eaten using a fish cutlery or with a fork and knife. If there are no special utensils, you can eat fish with two dinner forks.

If a spatula and a fork are served with the fish, then the spatula is held in the right hand and holds the pieces, and the fork is held in the left and the bones are separated.

If two forks are served with fish, one is used for eating and the other for removing bones.

If one fork is served with the fish, then take it in the right hand, and a piece of bread in the left.

If the fish is served whole (boiled or smoked), then first the upper part of the fillet is separated from the skeleton and eaten, then the spine and bones are separated. Put it aside and proceed to the second part. After this dish is eaten, a fish skeleton should remain on the plate.

If there is a fish bone left in your mouth, you need to discreetly place it on the fork with the tip of your tongue and put it on the edge of the plate.

Cold fish dishes are eaten using snack utensils.

Boiled and hot smoked stellate sturgeon, sturgeon and beluga are eaten only with a fork.

A slice of lemon served with cold fish is applied to the lips after the fish is eaten.

Oysters in restaurants are served already opened. First, squeeze the lemon into the shell, then take the oyster in your left hand and use a fork to scoop out the flesh. Eat it with a special device.

Crayfish are eaten with hands. At the same time, there should be bowls of moderate temperature water on the table in order to wash your hands after eating. This water usually contains chopped lemons; rose petals are less commonly used. Also, along with such vases, there must be clean napkins, cotton or paper, which must be removed immediately after finishing the meal.

In a similar way, they also eat asparagus and “tabaka” chickens.

For lobsters/lobsters, a special set is used: tweezers, a special short fork and a spatula. The lobster shell is cut with tweezers, starting from the back. The claws are cut in the same way. The soft meat is removed with a special long fork with two prongs.

It is also common to eat shrimp with your hands.

Snack

If you decide to try a snack, put it on a plate and eat it with a fork and knife.

Cheese, poultry, ham, sausage and other natural meat dishes are not cut into small pieces immediately. It is necessary to cut such dishes using a knife and fork, gradually.

A snack, for example, if it is ham, cannot be placed on a piece of bread.

If the sausage is served unpeeled, then peel each piece on the plate with a knife and fork. Dry sausage is eaten with the skin on.

A soft-boiled egg is placed in a special glass, then the top is hit with the edge of a spoon. If the top doesn't come off, you can remove it with your fingers. Eating an egg requires a spoon.

Scrambled eggs can be eaten with a spoon or fork, depending on the consistency.

Sausages and sausages with thin skins can be eaten without removing them.

All types of cheese are served after meat dishes. Take cheese in portions.

Spaghetti or pasta sticks are very difficult to eat and look good. There are three ways:

The first method suggests using a fork and spoon. The spoon should be held in your left hand. Place the edge of the spoon into the plate and wrap the pasta around the fork in the recess of the spoon. Wrap a little pasta around a fork and cut off a portion with a spoon.

Second method: hold the fork like a knife prepared for cutting. Dip a fork into the thick pasta and lift it up, releasing a small portion. Then put the fork with the pasta back into the plate, wrap it around the fork and quickly put it in your mouth.

The third method: prick the pasta on a fork, wrap a portion of pasta around it (the fork should be held vertically). The basic rule is to scoop no more than 2-3 strands of pasta onto a fork.

The salad is eaten with a fork. The knife is used to cut large pieces or lettuce leaves.

As much as possible, do not cut green salad with a knife. If it is served in such a way that the leaves are too large, then you need to cut them with a fork or carefully wrap the leaves around it and eat, trying not to leave any traces of sauce on your chin.

The pate can be taken with a knife, but, as a rule, the pate is eaten by separating small pieces with a fork. Spreading pate on bread can only be done in a family circle.

Take mustard and salt in small spoons. Mustard is placed on the bottom of the plate on the right side.

Soups, broths

It is not customary to finish soups without leaving any traces; according to the rules, a small amount of soup remains in the plate. However, at home, you can finish the soup by tilting the plate away from you.

Soups are eaten with a spoon, scooping from the body and bringing it to the mouth with a wide edge.

A spoon is used if you need to catch croutons, eggs, or pieces of meat floating in the soup.

A spoon is also used if the soup is served in a cup with two handles.

If the soup is very hot, do not blow on it to cool it down, and do not stir it with a spoon. It's better to wait for a while until it cools down.

There should be enough soup in the spoon so that it does not overflow from it.

The soup spoon is not placed on the table, but is left on the plate after eating.

The broth should be eaten with a dessert spoon, bringing it to the mouth with the sharp end, slightly obliquely.

Broths and soups served in cups should be drunk as you drink coffee or tea, without using a spoon.

When you eat the first course, do not sip, eat silently.

If there are dumplings, noodles or potatoes in the soup, crush them with the edge of a spoon.

Chicken in broth is both the first and second, so first you eat the broth from the plate with a spoon, and then the chicken pieces with a fork and knife.

Fruits

The fruits served on the table are not checked for strength or selected.

Bananas are served unpeeled and eaten with your hands.

Oranges are peeled and divided into slices. They eat them with their hands. The bones are placed on a plate.
It is recommended to peel as follows: cut the peel crosswise, remove it and divide the orange into slices. Neither oranges nor tangerines should be peeled in a spiral manner.

The grapefruit is served cut crosswise, the middle is separated from the peel, but remains inside. It should be eaten with a spoon; you can sprinkle it with powdered sugar.

Watermelons and melons are usually cut into medium-sized slices, served with the peel and eaten with a fork and knife. Taking a piece from a common plate, you need to place it on your plate, skin side down, and then use a fruit knife to cut off a thin slice. and, having freed it from the seeds, put it into your mouth on a fork.

It is permissible to eat melon with a spoon.

The mango should be cut in half on its own plate. It is eaten with a spoon, after removing the bone.

The pineapple must be peeled, cut crosswise into thin slices and placed on a plate. Eating pineapple with a fork and knife.

Apples and pears are cut lengthwise into 4-8 pieces with a fruit knife, after which the seed nest is removed. The resulting pieces are no longer cut, but bitten off.

Very aesthetes cut these fruits into four parts, place them on a plate, and then, taking a slice on a fork, remove the skin with a knife. The hardest part is keeping the treat on the fork. The peeled piece is then eaten on a plate using a knife and fork. It is acceptable to peel the fruit in your hand, but eat it on a plate with a knife and fork.

Peaches are cut in half with a fruit knife, the pits are removed with a knife, and they are eaten with your hands.

Sweet cherries should be taken by the branch and put into the mouth. If possible, discreetly spit the bone into your fist and then onto your plate.

You can do the same with grapes. But grapes are usually eaten whole. It is unacceptable to spit out the bones directly onto a plate or collect them in an ashtray.

The plums are broken with your fingers and the pit is placed on a plate.

Raspberries, blueberries, strawberries, strawberries or other berries are eaten only with a spoon.

Strawberries should be served peeled and without stems. It’s not nice to crush strawberries on a plate served with sugar and sour cream. The resulting mass does not look very aesthetically pleasing. The same rule applies to strawberries.

Compote served in a vase is eaten with a spoon. Drinking directly from a vase is unsightly. The fruit seeds are spat out onto a spoon and placed on a plate standing next to or under the vase.

Beverages

If any drink is offered before a meal, you must first swallow everything that is in your mouth and only then wash it down. It is advisable to wipe your lips with a napkin before doing this.

It's not nice to top up your drinks only for yourself. First, offer to refill the drink to your neighbors at the table.

Coffee is served with pre-diluted sugar or cream.

The teaspoon is intended for stirring sugar and cream, after which the spoon can no longer be used. It is simply placed on a saucer.

Tea and coffee are not poured into saucers.

Alcoholic drinks also need to be drunk correctly.

Cocktails are drunk in small sips with breaks.

You can drink vodka from a small glass right away, but you must remember that the glass may be refilled for you.

You can drink vodka little by little, starting from the third or fourth glass (of course, if necessary), since it is not customary to change the portion in such a situation.

You can drink to the bottom after toast only on special occasions. This is not mandatory now.

Whiskey is consumed with ice. Sometimes it is diluted with soda water.

It is advisable to drink wine, as well as liquor, in small sips.

It is advisable, but not necessary, to drink champagne and other sparkling wines immediately.

Cognac is also drunk in small sips, but with a longer break. At the same time, the glass can be in your hand, since cognac loves warmth.

What dishes should you drink with what drinks?

Usually lunch or, in some cases, dinner begins with cold appetizers. Dry white wines are served with these dishes.

Light red wines are suitable for meat salads or ham.

White wines of moderate strength are served with turkey, chicken, veal liver, hot ham, fried or baked fish.

Dry red wines go well with meat dishes, such as steaks, pork cutlets, stewed liver or smoked sausages.

Long-aged red wines are more suitable for wild meat.

The same wines are served with vegetables as with meat, and exclusively red wine is served with mushrooms.

Accordingly, sweet dessert wines with a high alcohol and sugar content, liqueurs or sweet sparkling wines are served with sweet dishes.

Dry white wines go well with cheese with a delicate and delicate taste.

Spicy and piquant cheeses should be paired with tart wine.

Red wines go well with game meat and other dark meats, but only white wines go with white meat, poultry or fish.

Both white and red wine go well with goose or pork, but these must be well-aged and strong wines.

Dessert

For desserts, there are special cutlery used to eat puddings, ice cream, cakes, creams, etc. When coffee, tea or sweets are served, all unnecessary dishes are removed from the table and vases with jam, sweets or cookies, plates with thinly sliced ​​lemon, and sugar are put out.

If a pie or cake is being served, each guest at the table is given a separate plate for dessert, a dessert spoon or knife is placed to the right of this plate, and a dessert fork is placed to the left.

Coffee or tea is placed near the plate on the right side with the handle turned to the left.
The cream is served hot in a special container, which in turn should be placed on a saucer.

Cakes and pies are eaten with a dessert spoon. You cannot use a fork and knife.

Pies made from puff pastry and shortcrust pastry are eaten with your hands.

Cakes and pastries are taken with a special spatula. Soft ones - creamy and biscuit - are eaten with a dessert fork (if there are none, you can use a spoon), crumbly ones can be taken by hand.

Jam and jelly are spread on bread with a knife.

Ice cream is eaten with a dessert spoon or a teaspoon.

These are just the basic rules that a well-mannered person should know.



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