How to find a person in Japan. Japan: How to meet a Japanese woman and start an affair with her. Attention! Bad news

Instruction

Even to maintain friendly relations, it is necessary to know the language spoken by a friend, even if it is a potential one. The Japanese for the most part do not even know English, if this is not required at work or if the Japanese himself does not need it personally. There are very, very few Russian-speaking Japanese, so it is imperative to master the language, at least at an average level. Japanese is considered one of the most difficult languages ​​in the world. According to statistics, it takes 2,200 academic hours of hard work to study it sufficiently. But this is a professional level, the basic degree of proficiency is given for 400-500 hours (a year of classes for 2 hours a day). According to the experience of many Russians, ignorance of the language quickly enough leads to the fact that the interest on the part of the Japanese quickly weakens and the acquaintance ends immediately. Therefore, at first you can start talking about yourself in broken or broken lines. And then, having learned the language, move on to discussing more complex topics.

The most popular dating option is through the Internet, through social networks. It is even easy to find former compatriots living in Japan there. But it is not easy to strike up a serious friendship with them. As a rule, hundreds and thousands of Russians try to make friends with them, and they are tired of such attention and are too picky in choosing friends. A good option is to get acquainted through cultural centers available both in Japan and in Russia. As a rule, many come to these centers in order to learn more about the culture of another country and get to know a friend. And here there are more chances to meet a Russian-speaking Japanese or a Japanese woman.

To many Russians, the Japanese seem taciturn, sullen and even angry. The fact is that in Japan, being laconic, not expressing one's emotions is a positive quality. Therefore, warm friendship can be very difficult to achieve. A broad soul often shocks reserved Japanese people, which is not conducive to establishing good relations. Therefore, it is not necessary to hug a friend at the first meeting. A distance of a meter is considered decent and only close friends can get closer to it.

You can talk, as with a compatriot, about anything. First, as already mentioned, briefly tell us about yourself. At first, to strengthen the friendship, talk about topics that are of interest to the Japanese. If you immediately begin to conquer a friend with knowledge of Japan, he may find the interlocutor a boring braggart. These topics are of little interest to him. But they will certainly be interested in the features of the life and culture of a Russian person, which he probably does not know.

In the same way, having invited a Japanese friend to visit, you should not meet him in a kimono and treat him to Japanese national dishes. All the same, these will not be able to show knowledge of Japanese etiquette and cuisine. Moreover, for him, all this will become a low-quality fake of what he is used to in his homeland. Meet him according to Russian custom, telling in advance how guests are welcomed here. Treat him with Russian dishes - okroshka, dumplings, pies, etc. After such a meeting, he will share his impressions with his compatriots for a long time and will definitely come again.

Useful advice

For lovers of correspondence: if all potential friends do not answer, check the encoding of your letters. If it is Russian, from the point of view of the Japanese, this is an unreadable and incomprehensible text. Letters to Japan should be sent in international or Japanese encoding.

Everyone who just started to correspond with the Japanese faced the first questions and problems. The first and probably the easiest question is what language the correspondence is in. Naturally, the most common language is English, it is used by 95% of Japanese who want to meet foreigners, but you can also meet those who speak Russian. Of course, for a long and fruitful communication with the Japanese, ideally, it is best to know the Japanese language, or to perfect English. In the majority, all communication comes down to this: "I don't understand yours." And in the end, the Japanese lose interest in you. To prevent this from happening, one of the options is to learn Japanese in parallel.

And one more piece of advice that I would like to give to novice scribes: experience shows that at first it is better to write in short phrases in simple, even broken, English about your life than to load a distant and still unfamiliar "in the first lines of your short letter" friend with extensive knowledge of kabuki theater, anime manga, or Japanese martial arts. Also, the Japanese are not very verbose (though not all), so ask a lot of questions while answering them at the same time.

If, despite repeated attempts to enter into correspondence with the Japanese, no one wants to answer you, think about what you missed by sending your letters. What language do you send them in? In what encoding? Etc. Taking into account also the spam factor (not only we, but also the Japanese suffer from "junk e-mail"), it cannot be ruled out that those Japanese who recklessly posted their ads on the Internet with their e-mail address are now being attacked by spammers and may not thinking about sending all incomprehensible mail (or letters "with kryakozyabry") coming to their address to the trash can. This is especially likely if you send letters in Russian encoding. Therefore, if you suspect that your letters do not reach the addressee, we advise you either to write in English (in the international encoding Central / Western European), or (if you nevertheless decide to write in Russian to those Japanese who have declared their desire to correspond in Russian), send letters in Russian JAPANESE ENCODED ONLY: JIS, Shift-JIS, EUC etc. (Unfortunately, so far, few of the "fans of correspondence with the Japanese" know that the two-byte Japanese language encoding tables include, in addition to the signs of Japanese writing proper, almost all the national alphabets of the world, including the Russian Cyrillic alphabet, which means that it is possible to correspond in Russian using the Japanese encoding of the E-mail message ).

If what is written in the previous paragraph is a complete misunderstanding for you, and you want to ask the question: "What do the words mean - Russian encoding , Japanese encoding and other cryptic words and expressions used above?", then you need to first understand the basics of computer literacy (at least familiarize yourself with the methods of national text encoding in e-mail messages). We hope that some of the links below will help you learn about this presentation.

In addition to this important computer information, below you will find links to sites that host addresses of Japanese people who want to correspond with foreigners.

We wish you good luck and new pen pals!

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useful links

Russian-Japanese Network (RYaS) Russian page of the Japanese multilingual site of electronic correspondence with foreigners. The site was created by the Japanese and is dedicated not only to the correspondence of the Japanese with the Russians or those who speak Russian, but also the correspondence of the Japanese with the French, Spaniards, Italians, Germans, Portuguese, Koreans and Chinese.
CORRESPONDENCE WITH THE JAPANESE Correspondence club on the website "WINDOW TO JAPAN". On this page, new addresses of Japanese people who want to correspond by e-mail are regularly posted. You can also submit your details to be posted on relevant sites in Japan.
Newsletter SAKURA The main goal of this project is to help you find pen pals. Of course, not in simple correspondence, but with a bias towards the topic, which is called “Japanese studies”.
dating japanese We want to immediately note that the ads posted on this site are taken from two sites, from among those links to which are given above. And one more very important detail, there is a section dedicated to tips for those who are just starting to correspond with the Japanese. Believe me, the Japanese are very specific in e-mail correspondence.
Communication with the Japanese? This is very easy to do: "1. Install support for languages ​​written in hieroglyphs in Windows. (Start, Settings, Control Panel, Regional and Language Options). 2. Go to the site http://www.tcup.com/chat (Do not forget that Moscow and Tokyo have a 6 hour time difference). 3. Register with Penpal http://www.penpal.net and try to chat. To do this, it is best to familiarize yourself with some of the features in communicating with the Japanese, which I described above. 4. Download Skype http://www.skype.com and try to find someone from Japan" (these recommendations are posted on the Internet by one of the forum members at homenet.corbina.net).
CORRESPONDENCE EXAMPLES Here are examples of possible correspondence in Japanese by e-mail. Solely for educational purposes, the texts given are slightly simplified (just a little), so that the details do not overshadow the main thing. In addition, all letters are provided with the necessary comments. The most useful material for those who are going to correspond with the Japanese. The principles of correspondence are demonstrated. In addition, much attention is paid to the explanation of vocabulary, grammar, as well as the explanation of hieroglyphs (information on the site www.komi.com/japanese - "Japanese Self-Teacher").
How to wish Happy New Year New Year in Japan (the holiday coincides with the European New Year) is one of the brightest and most widely celebrated holidays. The form of verbal congratulations depends on when you start congratulating: before the New Year (before January 1) or after (information on the website www.komi.com/japanese
Writing a New Year's card (12/23/2006) In general, New Year's cards in Japan are not at all like ours. Firstly, that they are just classic postcards, when on one side there is a picture with text, and on the other - only an address. Often they sell again "clean" postcards, and the sender writes and draws everything necessary on his own. There are also those where the drawing takes up about half of the postcard, and the rest of the space is left to be filled in manually. There are also such blank postcards on which you can print photos. Often people create a postcard on a computer and then print it even on their home printer. And yet, it is still believed that a fully printed postcard is not serious, disrespectful towards the addressee, so you need to write at least words of congratulations by hand. And, of course, the reverse side, where the address and name are written, is filled out exclusively by hand (information on the site www.komi.com/japanese - "Japanese Language Tutorial").
Japanese network encodings Although the Japanese language itself is not very complex, it uses one of the most complex writing systems... All this, of course, causes problems with the use of Japanese writing in computing (databases (SQL), e-mail, news, WWW). Such a large number of characters cannot be represented in one byte. Therefore, multibyte encodings are used when one character occupies two, three or more bytes.
A consequence of the arbitrariness of the code table Russian Internet and e-mail users are constantly faced with the problem of text encoding mismatch. For various historical reasons, in different computer systems, the placement of letters of the Russian alphabet (Cyrillic) falls on different code values. (It is worth saying that such problems in a somewhat weakened form are valid for all alphabets that have letters that are not included in the Latin alphabet, especially these problems are aggravated if there is an exchange between them and the Cyrillic alphabet).
Email problems Email has several issues that you need to be aware of in order to use it most effectively. The most important problem is the encoding problem, from which, as we will see below, two things follow at once...
MANY ENCODINGS, BUT ONE HEAD... The number of main languages ​​spoken by humanity is not precisely calculated, but there are about 200 of them. On the one hand, this is good and they need to be preserved as elements of the culture and identity of different peoples. On the other hand, the presence of a large number of languages ​​makes communication and mutual understanding between different people difficult... Unfortunately, the situation in the world of computers is approximately the same. Now we are not talking about programming languages ​​(of which there are also many), we are talking about various encodings in which information is presented ... If the first 128 characters were initially standardized and recognized by almost all countries, then there is some chaos with the second 128 characters. Of course, there are many countries and national languages, too, so these 128 characters were given over to national languages. Everything would be fine, but even here there is no unity. Take, for example, Russian symbols, which are of most interest to all of us. Three encodings are widely used here: DOS-866, Win-1251 and KOI-8, although there are several less popular ones.
Correspondence with the Japanese Tons of helpful tips on the Fushigi Nippon forum.
friends An interactive database of those wishing to find pen pals. You can set the selection by age, language of correspondence, place of residence in Japan, etc. (On the website: www.japan-guide.com Note: site in English).

Learning any language is impossible to imagine without practice. And no one will argue that it is best to practice with a native speaker of the language being studied. In our case, with the Japanese.

But, unfortunately, in Russian cities, representatives of the Land of the Rising Sun do not go in crowds, so you have to look for them on the net.

So, where to meet a Japanese?

Interpals . (www.interpals.net/) . One of the most popular resources for finding pen pals. Here you can immediately indicate the level of knowledge of foreign languages ​​and your native language. Thus, the search bar will mostly reflect native speakers of the language you specified.

Of course, one cannot ignoreFacebook (https://www.facebook.com). A huge number of Japanese have accounts on it, and it will not be difficult to find several interlocutors at once (or they will find you themselves).

The Japanese who are interested in Russia and Russian culture are likely to start a page in the Russian social networkIn contact with (https://vk.com). In this case, the advantage will be that such Japanese themselves will willingly want to communicate with you - they also need to practice the Russian language, just like we do Japanese.

Window to Japan: Correspondence . (http:// en- jp. org/ penpals. htm). This is a Russian-Japanese correspondence club. On it there is an exchange of addresses of those people who wish to correspond. You send your questionnaire to the club administration by e-mail, it is sorted and distributed on the Japanese Internet. The same is true for Japanese letters.

Service Lang 8 (http:// language-8. com/ ) is intended for learning a foreign language in practice. On this site you post your text in Japanese, it is checked by native speakers. You, in turn, check the text in Russian, composed by a Japanese.

And now about the sites, where to meet the Japanese, on which knowledge of English is required:

Oh , my Japan ! (https://ohmyjapan.com/) Designed specifically for English speakers who are passionate about Japan and Japanese culture. Here you can find friends with similar interests, practice Japanese and English. The site also gives recommendations on how to properly correspond with a Japanese in English.

Japansugoi community friends http://japansugoi.worldfriends.tv . Search on this site is set by profile. When registering, you will have to indicate quite a lot of information about yourself (up to religion and body type), you also need to upload your own photo so that your profile is reflected in the search for other users.

A what to do if you want not just to reprint grammatical constructions, but to train a "living" language? There are resources for this too.where to meet japanese .

I must say that modern Japanese are far from being too modest, so the offer to chat “live” can come pretty soon (especially if you are a pretty girl).

Skype (http://www.skype.com/). A program that can provide several types of communication at once: video, voice and text. Proven way to communicate for years around the world.

A very popular resource in Asian countries isline (http://line.me). This application is for PC and smartphones. Designed for video calls and instant sharing sms and voice messages. The main difference between Line and applications of the same type is the presence of a built-in social network with support for blogs and comments.

In order for communication to really look like a constructive dialogue, start communicating with the Japanese when you have knowledge of at least elementary grammar and, albeit a small, but stock of vocabulary used in everyday life. Otherwise, when you try to read messages in Japanese, you will dig into dictionaries, and when writing your own, you will suffer, trying to pull out the right word from the depths of your consciousness.

Do not try to tell everything about yourself at once and more and do not arrange an interrogation. It is better to communicate in short phrases, asking unobtrusive questions, while not forgetting to answer the questions of the person with whom you are corresponding.

The international language is English. Therefore, if you can’t communicate normally in Japanese, then start with English, simultaneously pulling up Japanese in the classroom.

I think many guys who come to Japan dream of having a Japanese girlfriend, and many even want to marry a Japanese woman. Today we will talk about the features of the female Japanese soul and Vladimir is our guest. Vladimir is 32 years old and in the last two years he has had serious affairs with five Japanese girls, while his level of Japanese is not as high as it might seem.

So, Vladimir, hello.
- Hi.
- Many Russians draw images and types of Japanese women from anime. Many really believe that they can instill fear in guys. How true is this?

I would argue that relying on anime as patterns of behavior is rather reckless. By the way, Japanese women, in the vast majority, watch anime only in childhood or at school. University students and older girls not only do not watch it, but also consider viewing it an act that is embarrassing to admit. Yes, they read manga at any age, play computer games, but anime is for children. There is, of course, a layer of fans, but in Japan they are treated with disapproval. In Japanese schools, not everything is as smooth as it is shown in the series. Students are often subjected to severe humiliation and harassment from classmates. If you are different or have weaknesses (for example, in physical education), this is the reason for bullying. All this leads to the fact that many Japanese women graduate from school as very frightened creatures. They practically do not express their opinion. They constantly apologize, do not find the strength to return objectionable goods to the store and generally take the initiative. I can’t say in any way that they are all like that, of course there are fighting girls, but they are more common among gyaru and hosts, and these are far from ordinary Japanese women and society eschews them.

(Gyaru is a collective term, something like our hippies. There are many varieties of gyaru. Gyaru girls wear flashy clothes, bright makeup. They can be in various rock bands, think little about work and family)

But if the vast majority of Japanese women are so shy, how can you get to know them, and even more so for a foreigner?

If a foreigner wants to meet a Japanese woman, then he must know some things. First, you should choose a girlfriend by age. If a guy, clearly over twenty, tries to make an acquaintance with a schoolgirl, she will simply run away. It is best to look for those who study at universities or are already working. Secondly, it's not the best idea to just approach girls on the street and offer to get acquainted, exchange phone numbers and so on. Yes, they will listen to you, but the relationship will most likely not go further, and if you press and insist, she will call the police. If you want to get acquainted on your own, then it is better to try your luck in the gyaru environment. Gyaru will not be afraid of you and will willingly make contact. There is an option to first make acquaintances on the Internet, through social networks, but this is a long and not reliable path. The best, in my opinion, way to get acquainted through Russian girls. That is, a Russian girl makes contacts with a Japanese woman (even just on the street) and they begin to communicate. Then he invites the Japanese woman to go somewhere together and then says - but do you mind if my friend goes with us (you can even say brother). You come to a meeting, start giving compliments, pay in a cafe or karaoke, and it's all over. It is then that it will become clear whether the Japanese woman wants to develop relationships. It is possible that her friend will come with a Japanese woman - the options are increasing. This is my experience.

Very interesting, it's good for those who have Russian girlfriends ... And what do Japanese women like? Where do they like to go on dates, how to spend time with them?

Most importantly, Japanese women are not spoiled for manifestations of romance. The guys here practically don't give them flowers, they don't carry them up the stairs and they don't take off their boots when you enter the house. Therefore, romance is the strong side of Russians, but it should not be too flashy. You should not come to a date with a bouquet of several dozen roses, a small bouquet is enough, something small but beautiful. For example, Japanese women love sunflowers. Open the door for them, carry them in your arms, hold your coat...

As for entertainment, most of the dates you will just go shopping, where she will "shop". In second place is visiting karaoke, cinemas, Disneyland. They also love to be photographed in the sticker machine. In Japan, it's customary on dates to pay everyone for themselves, but if you pay, they'll be happy. This is also a mandatory manifestation of romance.

Japanese women do not like to walk and even take the subway one stop. If you somehow break the law (for example, occasionally ride a hare), this will not be approved, but since you are a foreigner, you will be forgiven, but she herself will never do this. I am Japanese - we can’t do this, the answer will follow. Many Japanese women like branded items or dress like Europeans, but they don’t like to wear a kimono - they say it’s difficult to wear it. When traveling abroad, they will only go to the places that are indicated in their guidebook and take pictures against their background, in order to show them to their friends later. Going with them on some other route is for the most part doomed to failure - if this is not in the guidebook, then it is as if it does not exist.

Japanese women do not like to kiss or hug in public. If at the beginning of your acquaintance she will allow this (to show others that she is with a foreigner), but as the relationship develops, this will go away. Also, it is not customary to hug at a meeting, especially when it is crowded. It is not customary here to see you home, and even more so to your apartment. At first, you will part somewhere at the station or at the crossroads. And do not try to put pressure, at best, you will be taken to a completely different house. I had a funny case - I tried to walk the girl home, but she led to another. I did not know this and the next time I decided to surprise her, namely, I bought a huge teddy bear and from five in the morning I began to wait for her at the entrance. Naturally, she did not appear, because the house is different, but the residents were alerted by a strange foreigner with a bear, and they called the police. At that time, I hardly spoke Japanese, and I was taken to the station. Then, of course, when the truth came out, everyone laughed for a long time. If and more subtle things. For example, drinking a drink together from one bottle is considered an indirect kiss here. If a Japanese woman drank a little, and then offered you, this means that she is not against kissing and wants to develop relationships. If you drink without asking, he will not drink after you. Japanese women do not like horror films, and in the dark they are afraid to go far. Once, when we were walking in the dark, I suddenly shouted "Aaaaaa!!" and pretended to be afraid. In the next second, my friend clung to me in fear, screaming and tears in her eyes.

What about more intimacy?

I would not say that there is some special exoticism in sex with a Japanese woman, I can list only a few facts. For example, (in my experience) many Japanese women don't ask about condoms at all. By the way, local condoms are quite uncomfortable, and they strive to slide off. So the same for the night they are content with one orgasm. Several orgasms per night are unusual for them, they say that they get tired. Also, Japanese women do not like to have sex in crowded places, for example, in nature or in a car, as they are embarrassed that someone can see. And they don’t like houses either, because the walls are thin and the neighbors hear everything. Love hotels are the best for sex. I can’t say that Japanese women are prone to some kind of perversion - all this exists only in anime, but there is no taboo for them either. They don’t wear panties with teddy bears or stripes either - this is all only for children or in anime, while adults have quite ordinary underwear.

How far can an affair with a Japanese woman go, can it develop into something more serious?

You know, it all depends on age or status. Even if you have no money, but you show romance and give compliments, she will communicate with you. You will be something like a cute dog that you can show off to your friends and increase your own ego. But this will be a relationship only between you, most likely you will not be introduced to your parents. In general, ordinary Japanese women do not think about marriage until the age of 30 and marrying, say, a 22-year-old is unlikely. Moreover, for a wedding, you must have a status, namely a long-term visa, a job. If you're not okay with that, you can try your luck in a gyaru environment or find a Japanese woman in her thirties, possibly divorced with a child.

In the process of communication, you can be introduced to your parents, and they are generally not against the romance of your daughter and a foreigner. However, it is not against only as long as it is not about marriage. Parents will be interested in your status, your finances, and precisely the current state. Talking that after the wedding I will sell an apartment in Moscow and buy a house here will not convince them. I had a case - I made a proposal to a girl, bought an expensive ring, celebrated the New Year with her parents and then returned to Russia for a while. On my return, I learned that she told me that my father had strongly opposed the wedding. We agreed to meet with her and her parents, but in the morning the police called me, saying that my father forbade me to meet with my daughter. The police wanted me to sign a paper saying I understood, but I pretended not to. This angered the police, they even threatened deportation. In the end, my Japanese friends helped me and hushed up the case. The girl returned the ring to me, and then I found a letter where she apologized for all this. In general, the Japanese are faithful. If you have an affair, she will not cheat on you somewhere on the side.

Vladimir, thank you very much for your story. Is there any way my readers can contact you if they want to ask any questions?

Oh sure. You can talk to me by writing to me in private messages on the forum of the site Gaku.ru. My alias is moon.