Dedicated to a righteous woman. A beautiful story about a righteous wife. Dominance of a man over a woman
Question:
I am a young man and began to think about marriage. But I have a few questions that I would like to have answered before I start looking for a wife. The first question is about the wife: what kind of girl is the “owner of the religion” pointed out by the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him? I know that the more a girl has knowledge, worships Allah, is God-fearing, calls to Allah, the better, but what about the situation when a girl does not absorb all these qualities? As, for example, if it is limited to the performance of duties. Is she considered "the owner of the religion", which was meant by the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him? And also, does a girl who wears a hijab that reveals her face, or a niqab that opens her eyes, lose the status of "owner of religion"? In other words: if the parents of a young guy have chosen for him a girl who wears a hijab that does not cover her face, then can he refuse to match, since she is not the "owner of religion"?
Answer:
All praise belongs to Allah!
The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, bequeathed us to marry the "owners of religion." Who exactly is the “owner of religion”?
The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) urged to marry “the possessors of religion” and said: “A woman is married because of four things: because of her property, because of her nobility, because of her beauty and because of her religion. Choose the owner of religion, and you will succeed!” (Al-Bukhari 5090, Muslim 1466).
Abdul-Azeem Abadi, may Allah have mercy on him, said, interpreting this hadith: “A God-fearing and respectable person should embody religion in all things, especially those that are with him for a long time. Therefore, the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, ordered to strive to choose a companion who has a religion that is the ultimate dream ”(“ Avnul ma’bud ”, 6 \ 31).
As for the qualities possessed by girls who "possess religion", there are many of them. Among them are the following:
1. Correct . This quality is at the top of the list of good qualities. If a girl is from Ahlu s-Sunna wal Jamaa, then she has the best quality of “owners of religion”. And girls from among and are not “owners of religion”, whom a Muslim is ordered to marry. Because they can have a bad effect on their husband, children, or both.
2. Submission to husband . She must not disobey him when he tells her to do something. It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him, that he said: “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, was asked: “Which woman is the best?”, And he replied: “The one who pleases her husband when he looks at her, who obeys when he orders her to do something, and who does not do what he condemns with respect to herself and her property ”(an-Nasai, 3131, the hadith was called authentic by Sheikh Al-Albani in the book“ Sahih an - Nasai). Thus, the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, pointed out three important qualities that a good, righteous wife has. This:
but) When a husband looks at her, she pleases him with her religiosity, morality, attitude and appearance.
b) When her husband is absent, she guards her honor for him and guards his property for him.
in) When he commands her to do something, then she obeys him, except when he commands the disobedience of Allah.
3. Help your husband in his faith and religion . When she commands him to obey Allah and warns against doing forbidden things. It was narrated from Sauban, may Allah be pleased with him, that he said: “When what was sent down regarding silver and gold, people said:“ What kind of property should we keep? Then Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, said: “I will find out about this for you!”, And, sitting on his camel, he went to the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, and I was next to him. He said: “O Messenger of Allah, what property should we keep?” He replied: “Let each of you keep a grateful heart, a tongue that remembers Allah and a believing wife who will help you in the matter of akhira” (At-Tirmizi 3094, Ibn Maja 1856, Sheikh Al-Albani called the hadith authentic in the book “Sahih at- Tirmizi).
Al Mubarakfuri, may Allah have mercy on him, said, commenting on this hadith: “The words “a believing wife who will help you in the matter of akhira” mean that she will help him in his religion, reminding him of the onset of prayer, fasting and other types of worship. And also, what will prevent them from committing adultery and other forbidden things” (“Tuhfatul ahvazi” 8\390).
4. To be a righteous woman . The qualities of righteous women are: obedience to the Lord, fulfillment of duties to her husband in his property and in relation to herself, even if he is absent.
Allah Almighty said: “Righteous women are obedient and keep what is supposed to be kept, in the absence of their husbands, thanks to the care of Allah”(Sura “Women”, verse 34). Sheikh said Abdu-r-Rahman As-Saadi May Allah have mercy on him: "Righteous women are submissive"- that is, obedient to the Almighty Allah. "And they keep what they should keep"- that is, they are submissive to their husbands even in their absence, keeping themselves for their husband and keeping his property with the help of Allah Almighty, and not relying on themselves. The soul commands the bad, but whoever trusts in Allah, He is sufficient in matters of his religion and life” (“Tafsir al-Saadi”, p. 177).
It was narrated from Saad ibn Abil Waqqas, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “Four belong to happiness: a righteous wife, a spacious house, a righteous neighbor and a good mount. And four things are unfortunate: a bad neighbor, a bad wife, a cramped house and a bad mount” (Ibn Hibban, 1232).
Sheikhul Islam Ibn Taymiyyah, may Allah have mercy on him, said: “A righteous wife spends many years with her husband - a righteous man. She was given to him for temporary use, as the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “This world is given for temporary use, and the best thing that can be acquired in it is a righteous wife. Such that when you look at her, she pleases you, if you command her to do anything, she will obey, and if you are not around, she will keep herself and your property. She is the woman that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told the Muhajirs when they asked him what kind of wealth they should keep. He said: “Keep a grateful heart, a tongue that remembers Allah and a believing wife who will help you in the matter of akhira” (At-Tirmidhi).
Love and mercy will come from her, as Almighty Allah said about this in His Book. The bitterness of separation will be harder for her than death, harder than the loss of property and separation from the homeland, especially if one of them has affection for the other, or they have children who may die or their situation may worsen ”(“ Majmu' al fatawa", 35 \ 299).
5. Ethics and knowledge . It was narrated from Abu Musa al-Ashari, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “There are three categories of people who receive two rewards: a person from the People of the Book who believed in his prophet and believed in Muhammad, peace be upon him; a slave who performs duties to Allah and to his master; and a man who had a slave girl, and he began to teach her ethics and did it well, he began to teach her knowledge and did it well, and then freed her and married her. He will get two rewards!” (Bukhari 97, Muslim 154).
6. Showing obedience to Allah and abstaining from what is forbidden . This is one of the meanings of the expression "possessor of religion", given in the hadith, which we met at the beginning of the question.
Shafi'i scholar Al-Khatib Ash-Shirbini, may Allah have mercy on him, said: “The meaning of the word “religion” in the hadith is worship, righteous deeds and abstinence from forbidden things” (“Mugnil mukhtaj”, 3 \ 127).
If a woman combines between obedience to her Lord, doing what He commanded and leaving what He forbade, as well as obedience to her husband, then she will be from those whom the prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, delighted with great mercy at the entrance to Paradise! The hadith says: “If a woman performs her five prayers, observes a month of fasting, preserves her chastity and is submissive to her husband, then she will be told: “Enter Paradise through any of its gates that you wish!” (Ahmad 1664, Sheikh Al -Albani called the hadeeth good).
7. Worshiping Allah and Fasting . Allah Almighty said: “If he divorces you, then his Lord can replace you with wives who will be better than you, and will be Muslim women, believers, obedient, repentant, worshipers, fasting, both married and virgins” (Surah “Prohibition ", verse 5).
Thus, it became clear that the word "religion" covers many types of worship and submission to Allah, . It must be pointed out that everything that we have mentioned from the qualities and deeds is not on the same level in women. These qualities have many degrees, as we see it. And the more a girl will have modesty, knowledge and obedience to the Lord, the closer she will be to the meaning for which she was ordered to marry.
A girl "possessing religion" is best suited for a man, because she will keep his religion, help him in the affairs of akhira, please his eye, protect him when he is absent and bring up their children in the best possible way.
The article was prepared based on the materials of the site: http://www.islam-qa.com
With the name of Allah the Merciful, the Merciful
Foreword
Praise be to Allah - the Lord of the worlds, peace and blessings of Allah be upon our Prophet Muhammad, members of his family and all his companions!
This pamphlet is an appeal to every Muslim woman who puts her hopes in Allah and salvation in the Hereafter. This pamphlet describes the traits that a righteous wife should have, taken from the Holy Quran and the authentic Sunnah of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), as well as the sayings of the early Muslims, may Allah be pleased with them. Every Muslim woman should adopt these qualities and act in accordance with these instructions. The Almighty said: “There is no choice for a believing man or woman in any matter if Allah and His Messenger have already made a decision. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger is in clear error” (Conferences, 36).
"All my followers will enter Paradise except those who refuse". People asked: “O Messenger of Allah! And who can refuse? He said: "Whoever obeys me will enter Paradise, and whoever disobeys me refuses" al-Bukhari. See Fath al-Bari 13/249.
We ask Allah to make this work useful for everyone who reads it, and to make it sincere before His noble face!
MALE SUPERIORITY OVER WOMAN
Allah Almighty and Almighty said: “Men are the guardians of women, because Allah has given some people an advantage over others, and because husbands spend [on the maintenance of wives] funds from their property” (Women, 34).
Hafiz Ibn Kathir commented on this verse: “The guardianship of a man is manifested in the fact that he is the master and master of a woman and educates her when her character begins to bend” See "Tafsirul-Kuranil-'Azym" 1/741.
This is confirmed by the following words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): “If I could order a prostration to someone other than Allah, I would order a woman to bow before her husband. I swear by Him in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad! A woman will not fulfill her duties to her Lord until she fully fulfills her duties to her husband. She should not refuse him, even if she is in childbirth. See Sahihul-Jami' 5295.
Allah Almighty said: “Righteous women are obedient [to Allah and their husbands] and keep in the absence of their husbands what Allah ordered to keep” (Women, 34).
Shaykhul-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (may Allah have mercy on him) interpreted this verse as follows: “A righteous woman is one who always obeys her husband. After performing duties to Allah and His Messenger, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, there is nothing more important for a woman than fulfilling her duties to her husband. See Majmu'ul-fataawa 32/275.
Modern women should pay attention to these instructions. To an even greater extent, this applies to those women who transgress the boundaries of what is permitted, behave like men, and try to control their husbands. These women do whatever they want. They lead a promiscuous life and call themselves fighters for the freedom and rights of women. But in reality they are women who have gone astray and prefer the life of the world to the life to come.
Our sister! Be careful and do not stray from the true path. Do not follow in the footsteps of such women, for a Day awaits you, from the horror of which even children will turn gray.
Allah Almighty has laid down innate qualities in men and women that provide men with a certain dominance over women.
A RIGHTEOUS WIFE IS BETTER THAN THE BENEFITS OF THE WORLD
In the collection of authentic hadiths of Imam Muslim, it is reported that ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr said that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Worldly goods are temporary pleasures, the best of which is a righteous wife”. Muslim.
The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also said: “A grateful heart, a tongue that remembers Allah and a righteous wife who will help you in life and in religion are better than what people accumulate” al-Bayhaqi in Shuabul-Iman See Sahihul-Jami’ 4409.
It is also reported in the collections of al-Bukhari and Muslim that Abu Hureyra narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “A woman is married because of four things: because of her wealth, because of her origin, because of her beauty, and because of her religion. Seek the one who is committed to religion, otherwise you will lose!”.
“Prosperity consists in four things: a righteous wife, a spacious dwelling, a righteous neighbor, and a comfortable vehicle. Misfortune also lies in four things: a bad wife, a bad neighbor, a bad vehicle and a cramped home. al-Hakim. See Sahihul-Jami' 887.
The Sunnah is replete with such messages, from which the importance of choosing a righteous spouse becomes clear. It also means that a Muslim woman must have noble qualities in order to be among those with whom Allah is pleased.
Muslim sister! These are the qualities of a noble wife in the form in which they are mentioned in the Scripture of Allah and the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), as well as the sayings of our righteous ancestors, may Allah Almighty be pleased with them. Read this and try to cultivate these qualities in yourself. Indeed, Allah helps His sincere servants to achieve what they aspire to, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said about this: “Knowledge is acquired only through study, and prudence is acquired through patience. Whoever tries to get something will get it.” ad-Darakutni. Hadith is good. See Sahihul-Jami' 2328.
QUALITIES OF A RIGHTEOUS WIFE
“Righteous women are obedient [to Allah and their husbands] and keep in the absence of their husbands what Allah ordered to keep” (Women, 34).
Ibn Kathir commented on this verse: “Ibn ‘Abbas and many other interpreters believed that we are talking about women who are submissive to their husbands. Imam as-Suddi and other interpreters believed that we are talking about women who protect the honor and property of their husbands in their absence. See Tafsirul-Kur'anil-'Azym 1/743.
“If a woman performs five prayers, fasts Ramadan, observes chastity and obeys her husband, then she will be told: “Enter Paradise through the gate you wish!” Ibn Hibban. See Sahihul-Jami' 660.
It is also reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Your wives will be from among the inhabitants of Paradise if they are loving, giving birth and caring for their husbands. And if such a woman angers her husband, she will put her hand on his hand and say: “I will not close my eyes until you are pleased with me.” Ibn Asakir, See as-Silsilya as-Sahih 287.
It is also reported in the collection of hadiths of Imam Ahmad and al-Nasaiya that Abu Hurairah said that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was asked: "Which wife is the best?" He replied: “The one who pleases her husband when he looks at her, obeys him when he tells her something, and does not contradict her husband if he does not like something in herself or in the way she spends his property” See Sahih Sunan al-Nasai 3030.
Muslim sister! Check if you have such traits, and if not, then try to acquire them in order to win the favor of Allah. Do it for yourself, your husband and your children, for a calm and happy life on earth and after death.
Once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) asked a certain woman: "Do you have a husband?" She answered: "Yes". He asked: "Is he happy with you?" She answered: "He's only mad because I can't do anything" “Be attentive to him, because for you he is Hell and Paradise” Ahmad 4/341. Sheikh al-Albani called the hadeeth authentic.
From what has been said, it follows that a righteous wife should be:
1 Devout, i.e. do good deeds and fulfill their duties to the Lord;
2 obedient to her husband in that which the Almighty and All-good Allah has not forbidden;
3 protecting her own honor, especially in the absence of her husband;
4 frugal with the property of her husband and her children;
5 striving for her husband to always see her only beautiful, smart and smiling;
6 trying to win over her husband when he is angry with her, because the husband is both Heaven and Hell for the wife;
7 who does not oppose her husband when he desires her. If a woman fulfills these instructions, then Paradise is promised to her through the mouth of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). That is why the hadeeth says: “If a woman performs five prayers, fasts in Ramadan, observes chastity and obeys her husband, then she will be told: “Enter Paradise through the gate through which you wish!”
EXAMPLE OF A RIGHTEOUS WIFE
It is reported from the words of ash-Sha'bi that once Shureikh said to him: “O Sha'bi! You should marry a Tamim woman. They are very smart." He asked: “What is their intelligence?” Shureikh said: “One day I was returning from a funeral in the afternoon and passed by their settlements. There I met an old woman standing near the door. Next to her stood a girl, the most beautiful I have ever seen in my life. I approached and asked for a drink, although I was not at all thirsty. "What do you want to drink?" the old woman asked. I replied: "Something." She said: "Hurry, girl! Bring him some milk! I don't think this man is local." I asked, "Who is this girl?" She answered: “This is Zeinab, daughter of Jarir. She is from the Hanzali family.” I asked, "Is she free or busy?" The old lady replied: "Free". Then I said, "Marry her to me." "If you match" the old woman replied in the dialect of the Tamim tribe. I went home to rest, but sleep left me. When I performed the midday prayer, I took the hands of my respected brothers, the reciters of the Koran ‘Alqama, al-Aswad, al-Musayab and Musa ibn ‘Arfata. With them I went to meet the girl's uncle. He met me and asked: "O Abu Umayya! What do you want?" I replied, "I want to marry Zeinab, your brother's daughter." He said: "She wouldn't mind marrying you either." And then he married me to her. That's when I remembered the hard-heartedness of the women of the Tamim tribe and regretted what I had done. I said to myself, “What am I going to do with the Tamim women? I'd rather divorce her." But then I said, “No, I'd rather hold her close. Maybe I'll be happy. And if not, I will do as I please.” If you could see, Sha'bi, how the women instructed her when they brought her to me. According to the Sunnah, if a wife comes to her husband, he should get up and perform a prayer of two rak'ats, and then ask Allah to grant him the good that is in his wife, and ask Allah to protect him from the evil that is in her . I performed the prayer and ended it with the words of greeting. Then I noticed that she was praying behind me, and when I finished praying, the slave girls came to me, took my clothes and put on me a dark yellow shirt. When the house was empty, I went up to her and put my hand on her waist. She said : "Wait, Abu Umayya! Stay where you are." Then she said: “Praise be to Allah, Whom I praise and ask for help! Blessings to Muhammad and his family! I don't know you and I don't know your character. Tell me what you like about me sticking to it and what you don't like about me pulling away from it.". And she also said : “You were already married in your people, and I was also married. But what happened was what Allah had ordained. Now I am yours, and therefore do as Allah commands you: keep it in a good way or let it go in peace. Here's what I wanted to say. And I ask forgiveness from Allah for myself and for you!”
Shureikh continued: “O Sha’bi! She forced me to turn to her with the words: “Praise be to Allah, Whom I praise and ask for help! Peace and blessings be upon the Prophet and his family! You spoke great words. If you adhere to them, you will receive a good lot. But if you turn away from them, it will turn against you. I love things like this and I don't like things like that. Now we are together, and therefore there is no need to distinguish between us. If you see something good, then spread it. And if you see something bad, then cut it." Then she said something, but I don't remember it anymore. She also asked: “How do you perceive the visits of relatives?” I said, "I don't like it when in-laws start bothering me." She asked: “And who do you want to let home from your neighbors? I will let them in. And those whom you do not love, I will not love either. I said, "That family is honest, that one is bad." Oh Shabi! That night I slept happy. After that, she lived with me for a year, and I did not see anything bad from her. At the beginning of the next year, I returned home from a meeting of the Sharia court and saw an old woman there who was in charge of our house. I asked, "Who is this?" I was told: "This is your mother-in-law." At that moment, I forgot everything I felt. Then I sat down facing the old lady. She said: "Peace be with you, Abu Umayya!" I replied: “Peace be with you too! Who are you?" She said: "I am your mother-in-law." I said, "May Allah bring you even closer!" She asked: "How do you like your wife?" I replied: “A wonderful wife!” She said: "O Abu Umayya! A woman is not bad if there are two reasons: if she gave birth to a son or if she received the recognition of her husband. If you begin to be tormented by doubts, then take up the whip. I swear by Allah! There is nothing worse in a man's house than a spoiled wife.". I said, “By Allah! You gave her a good upbringing." She asked: “Do you want your mother-in-law to come to you?” I said, "Whenever you want." She came to me at the beginning of every year and gave good advice. I lived with my wife for twenty years without reproaching her for anything. And only once I reproached her, and then, having acted unjustly myself. Here is how it was. Muazzin announced the beginning of prayer after we performed two rak'ahs of voluntary prayer. Then I was the imam of the whole village. Suddenly I noticed the approach of a scorpion. I took the dishes and covered him, and then I said: “Zeynab! Don't move until I come." If you could see, Sha'bi! When I returned from prayer, I found that the scorpion had already stung her. I asked everyone to calm down and that they bring me salt. I tapped her finger and then began to read the suras al-Fatiha, al-Falyak and an-Nas. See Tabai' an-Nisa 44-46.
CIRCUMSTANCES TO BE AWARE OF YOUR HUSBAND
1. Husband's anger
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “The prayers of three people do not rise above their ears: a runaway slave until he returns; the woman who falls asleep when her husband is angry with her; and a ruler with whom his people are dissatisfied" at-Tirmizi. See Sahih Sunan at-Tirmidhi 295.
2. Causing suffering to the husband
Imam Ahmad and other experts on hadith narrated a hadith from the words of Mu'adh, which reports that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “When a wife causes her husband suffering in this world, then his wives from among the (Paradise) houris say: “Do not torture him! May Allah destroy you! He is only your guest, and very soon he will part with you, and will be with us. Ahmad, See Sahihul-Jami' 7192.
3. Showing ingratitude for the blessings of the husband
The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Hell was shown to me, and it turned out that most of its inhabitants were women who showed ingratitude.” Ingratitude, which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) spoke of, also meant disbelief, and the companions asked: “They did not believe in Allah?” To which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “They showed ingratitude towards their husbands and did not thank for the good deeds that they received. If you do good to any of these women for a long time, and then she sees something from you that she does not like, she will definitely say: “I have never seen anything good from you.” al-Bukhari and Muslim.
4. Demanding a divorce without a good reason
At-Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud narrated the hadith of Sauban, which reports that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “If a woman asks her husband for a divorce without a good reason, then she will be deprived of the opportunity to feel even the fragrance of Paradise” See Sahih al-Jami' 2706.
5. Obey your husband in disobedience to Allah
Ahmad and al-Hakim reported that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “There is no submission to the created, in disobedience to the Creator” See Sahih al-Jami' 7520.
It is appropriate to recall that the devil instructs some women to disobey their husbands in what they are obliged to do, and vice versa to obey them in what is forbidden by Sharia. May Allah guide such women to the straight path!
When husbands tell them to do something, they say, "This is not allowed, and this is forbidden." Thus, they try to avoid obedience to their husbands. But they should remember the following saying of Allah Almighty:
“On the Day of Resurrection you will see those who slandered Allah with blackened faces. Is there not a place in Hell for the proud? (Crowds, 60).
Hassan al-Basri said: “There is no doubt that slandering Allah and His Messenger, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, proclaiming the forbidden is lawful, and the forbidden is lawful, is an obvious disbelief.”
6. Voluntary fasting, without the permission of the husband
Abu Hurairah reported that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “It is not permissible for a woman to fast in the presence of her husband, without his permission, unless it is Ramadan or if he is not on his way” Abu Dawud, Authentic Hadith.
7. Refusing intimacy with your husband
It is reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “If a husband calls his wife to his bed and she does not come, after which he spends the night angry at her, then the angels will curse her until morning” Muslim. See Sharh Sahih Muslim 10/259.
8. Disclosure of intimate relationships
It is reported that Asma bint Yazid said that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Surely, one of the men sometimes talks about what he does with his wife, and for sure, one of the women tells what she does with her husband”. The people fell silent, and then Asma said: “You are right, O Messenger of Allah! I swear by Allah, both women and men act in this way.”. Then the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Do not do that! Verily, it is like two shaitans on the road and having sexual intercourse in front of people.” Ahmad. Sheikh al-Albani confirmed the authenticity of the hadeeth.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also said: “The worst position of people on the Day of Judgment before Allah will be such a person who had intimacy with his wife, after which he spread her secret” Muslim.
9. Taking off your clothes outside of your own home
Imam Ahmad and other scholars of hadith reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman takes off her clothes not in the house of her husband, then the great and mighty Allah will dishonor her” See "Sakhihul-Jami'" 2708.
10. Inviting someone into the house without your husband's permission
In the collection of authentic hadiths al-Bukhari, it is reported that Abu Hureyra said that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “It is not allowed for a woman to fast in the presence of her husband without his permission and let strangers into the house without his permission” See Fath al-Bari 9/295.
11. Leaving the house without the permission of the husband
Allah Almighty and Almighty has said: "And come to your homes..."(Hosts, 33).
Ibn Kathir (may Allah have mercy on him) commented on this verse: "This means: don't leave the house unnecessarily" See "Tafsirul-Kuranil-'Azym" 3/768.
If a woman is obliged to obey her husband, then this means that she does not have the right to leave her husband's house without his permission.
HUSBAND CARE
Muslim sister! We will give you a vivid example of how the companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) looked after their husbands.
In an authentic hadith narrated by Muslim, it is reported that Asma bint Abu Bakr said: “az-Zubayr married me, having neither property nor slaves - nothing but his horse and a piece of land. I fed his horse with hay, took care and looked after him. I also ground oatmeal for dough, brought water and kneaded dough for bread. I did not know how to bake bread well, and therefore our neighbors from among the Ansar baked bread for us. They were trustworthy women." Asma also said : “I took seeds from the land that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, allocated az-Zubair. It was a plot the size of two-thirds of a farsakh.” See Sahih Muslim 2182.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “If a woman knew what her duties to her husband were, then she would not even sit down until he had lunch and dinner” at-Tabarani in al-Kabir. See Sahihul-Jami' 5259.
ASMA BINT KHARIJI'S ADVICE TO HIS DAUGHTER:
“You left the nest where you grew up and found yourself in a bed you don't know, with a spouse you're not used to. So become earth for him, and he will become heaven for you, become his bed, and he will become your support, become his slave, and he will become your slave. Do not pester him, for then he will hate you, and do not move away from him, for then he will forget you, but if he approaches you, approach you too, if he begins to move away, move away also. And take care of his sense of smell, hearing and sight, and let him smell only a pleasant smell from you, and hear only good words from you, and see you only beautiful..
A similar instruction was given to her daughter by Umm Akil. See Tabai' al-Nisa' 28.
APPEAL TO WIVES AND HUSBANDS
All of the above was said in order to show the Muslim sisters the right path established by the Almighty and All-good Allah in His writing and His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) in the Sunnah. But this does not mean that the husband has the right to offend his wife or cause her suffering if she does not fulfill all her duties. It is reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “A believing man has no right to hate a believing woman. And if he is dissatisfied with one trait of her character, then he remains satisfied with another trait of her character. Muslim. See Sharh Sahih Muslim 10/312.
O Muslim brother! If it seems to you that your wife violates her duties or has a bad temper, then maybe the reason for this is sins ?! Our righteous predecessors said: “Indeed, we noticed that when we disobeyed Allah, this was reflected in the morals of our wives and even our mounts on which we rode.”
As for the obstinate wives, you should first of all try to correct her with advice and good instructions. Remind her of Allah and frighten her with God's punishment. But if she is stubborn and continues to commit sins, then stop sleeping with her in the same bed. But do not leave her alone in the house, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If you avoid intimacy with her, then do it in the same house”. If she reforms, then it will do her good, and if not, then you should continue to give her instructions and avoid sexual intercourse with her. Allah Almighty and Almighty said: “And those women whose disobedience you fear, exhort, avoid in the marital bed and strike. But if they begin to obey you, then do not offend them ”(Women, 34).
Ibn Kathir said: “The command to hit wives means that the husband has the right to lightly hit his wife if instructions and separation in bed did not help her improve. In an authentic hadith narrated by Muslim from the words of Jabir, it is reported that during the farewell pilgrimage, the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said:“Fear Allah and take care of your wives, for they are your helpers. They must obey you and not let those who you do not like into the house. But if they do otherwise, then beat them, but not hard. But don't forget that you have to feed and clothe them." . Ibn ‘Abbas and many other interpreters said that hitting wives should be light. Hassan al-Basri said that you should beat your wife without leaving marks.” See "Tafsirul-Kuranil-'Azym" 1/743.
A husband should be careful not to hit his wife in the face, even if he does it lightly, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Don't hit her in the face."
RIGHTS OF THE WIFE
The husband should perform his duties to his wife, just as he wants his wife to perform her duties to him. Therefore, he should not harm her and touch her feelings. Imam Ahmad in the collection "al-Musnad" transmitted a hadith from the words of Hakim ibn Mu'awiya al-Qushayri, who said that his father once said: "O Messenger of Allah! What are the obligations of a husband to his wife? He said: “You must feed her if you eat yourself, clothe her if you dress yourself. Do not hit her in the face and do not say nasty words to her, and if you avoid intimacy with her, then do it in the same house. See Iruaul-Galil 7/98.
And in a hadith transmitted by al-Bukhari, Muslim and other experts on hadith from the words of ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr ibn al-’As, it is reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “O ‘Abdullah! I was told that you fast during the day and pray at night.”. He said: "Yes, O Messenger of Allah!" The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Don't act like that. Fast and break your fast. Pray at night and sleep. Verily, you must fulfill your duties towards the body, the eyes and the wife.” See Fathul Bari 9/299.
It is also reported that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever had two wives, but leans towards one of them, on the Day of Judgment will drag a part of his body with him”. Abu Dawud, at-Tirmidhi. Sheikh al-Albani called the hadeeth authentic. See Iruaul-Galil 7/80.
Everything we have said is a very brief summary of the topic under discussion, but this did not prevent us from touching on the main relationship between spouses.
I ask the Almighty and all-good Allah, through His beautiful names and majestic qualities, to make this work useful for me and all other Muslims. I also ask Him that all husbands become witnesses of how unselfishly their wives fulfill their duties to them. But this does not mean that if one of the spouses sees flaws in the other, then he should respond in kind. By no means! Each of the spouses will certainly be held accountable to Allah for the fulfillment of their duties to their life partner.
Conclusion
Each of the spouses must fulfill their obligations to each other, which Allah Almighty has endowed them with, just as they must observe the rights assigned to them by Allah. A woman should not demand equality from her husband in all matters, just as a man, in turn, should not abuse his superior position.
We advise men to fear Allah, be fair to their wives and treat them with respect. This is what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) commanded when he said: “Treat women well! Verily, a woman is made of a rib, and the crooked part of the rib is the top. If you want to straighten it, you will break it, but if you leave it, it will remain crooked. So treat women well." al-Bukhari and Muslim.
Good treatment of women implies courtesy, teaching Islam and patience, encouraging what Allah has commanded, and warning against all that is forbidden. Indeed, this can help them to enter Paradise, if it is the will of Allah.
by sergey.polevoy on June 14, 2012 ·
Godly Women of the Bible.
Translation of "Godly Women of the Bible" by Dr. John Rice
“Who can find a virtuous wife? its price is higher than pearls; the heart of her husband is confident in her, and he will not be left without profit; she repays him with good, and not with evil, all the days of her life. He extracts wool and flax, and willingly works with his own hands.
“He opens his mouth with wisdom, and gentle instruction is in her tongue. She watches over the household in her house and does not eat the bread of idleness. The children stand up and please her, - the husband, and praises her: "There were many virtuous wives, but you surpassed all of them." Prettiness is deceptive and beauty is vain; but a woman who fears the Lord is worthy of praise. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works be glorified at the gate!” (Prov. 31:10-13; 26-31).
There are some wonderful thoughts here about a godly woman.
I have more reason to thank God for virtuous women than most men. Mrs. Rice and I have now been married for fifty-five and a half years. God has given us six beautiful daughters. In addition, several wonderful women are helping me with the Sword of the Lord organization. Some have been here for many years. How dedicated and sacrificial they are! And wherever I go, godly women sing in choirs, run daycare centers, help with home visits, teach Sunday school, assist in the ministry of help. Thank God for virtuous women!
1. The Godly Woman in Proverbs 31
A virtuous woman is worth more than pearls
Proverbs 31 contains many thoughts about such a woman. First, she is kind. The virtue inherent in a man is worthy of praise, but there is something special and valuable in a virtuous woman. It is not surprising when we see Arab women with veils on their faces, but this does not mean that every woman should cover her face. God created a beautiful woman. It's okay to wear perfume and groom yourself to look and smell good. But why look like someone gave you a black eye? God designed a woman to be beautiful and attractive, but some of you go to extremes. When the bride appears in the aisle of the church, people exclaim: "Well, isn't she beautiful!" Like all brides. God has put beauty in every virtuous woman. And he who finds a wife finds good. “Who can find a virtuous wife? its price is higher than pearls. In the sense that a woman is more a woman than a man is a man. Let me explain. A long time ago the poet said:
Love is just a part of a man's life
but that's all a woman has.
A man can be a statesman, a blacksmith, a farmer, a preacher. He can be involved in politics or have his own business. He has a job. But for a woman there is no better occupation than to be a good wife and mother. She may work to help her husband. Sometimes she can be on her own and work outside the home. But most of all, a woman should strive to become a good wife and mother. In a sense, this is your profession, the highest goal that a woman can set for herself.
That is why a benevolent woman is valued above pearls. Who will find a virtuous wife? A woman is more of a woman than a man is a man, because a man has different duties and jobs. This means that the woman is more vulnerable. Therefore, you should take more care of your clothes and modest behavior.
The Lord said that it was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman, deceived, fell into a crime. Perhaps Adam said, "My wife has sinned by wanting to eat of the fruit, but I don't want to leave her alone in this evil world, so I will eat with her." I don't know how well Adam understood what was going on, but he entered into the world of sin because of Eve's act. Therefore, a woman, especially a working woman, must be careful. If possible, be a housewife. The woman in question worked at home and sold belts. Her lamp burned until late at night and was lit until dawn to prepare food. She was frugal and hardworking. Thanks to her work, she acquired the field. Sometimes righteous women are forced to work outside the home while in the world. In such a case, there should be a holy enclosure around you, consisting of modesty and abstinence. You have a weak point - beauty that you do not want to mess up.
She honored her husband and obeyed him.
The greatest virtue of a woman in Proverbs 31 is centered on her husband. "The heart of her husband is sure of her." She is a good wife, a virtuous woman, and therefore her greatest desire is to please her husband. A righteous woman has many virtues, but it is this one that God values above all else. “Wives, obey your husbands as to the Lord, because the husband is the head of the wife, just as Christ is the head of the Church, and He is the Savior of the body. But just as the Church is subject to Christ, so are wives to their husbands in everything” (Eph. 5:22-24). And then it follows: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the Church and gave Himself for her” (v. 25). This gives the woman a sacred and holy status. A man's love for his wife is not just passion. The natural sex drive is inherent in husband and wife; but when the honeymoon is over, there should be unity of hearts, a feeling of joy and dependence on each other, a close connection of hearts, unanimity.
A husband should love his wife when she is young and weighs 50 kg, then he should love her when she weighs 80 kg. and walks around. He must love her with disheveled hair, when her bread is burnt, the beds are not made and the dishes are in the sink. He must love her as Christ loved the church, not because she is easy to love, but because he is such by his inner convictions. Christ loves us not because we are so good, worthy or beautiful, but because such are the qualities of His great Person.
You complain that love has grown cold. So warm it up. If God told a man to love his wife, then he is able to do it. In Titus 2, older women are commanded to "admonish the young to love their husbands, to love their children." Therefore, dear woman, if God said to love your husband, you are able to do it. If you once fell in love with him, then you continue to love. You should not act according to circumstances, but do what you think is right according to your convictions. Love abides, and with it happiness and joy. A woman should obey her husband and be a good wife for him.
There is something beautiful about a man having complete confidence in his wife. Every man should have someone who considers him the smartest person alive. A woman should think of her man as the strongest, most faithful and most handsome. A man needs a woman who can say, “I am completely dependent on my husband. He is the smartest man and the best man I know." A righteous man becomes even better and stronger if someone admires him, loves and trusts him, follows him.
What are the virtues of a righteous Christian woman?
She is a good hostess
Notice how diligently our woman of chapter 31 does housework, embroidering, how early she gets up to cook food. She is a good hostess.
In 1 Timothy, Paul writes from inspiration that it is quite normal for the church to take into custody an elderly woman over sixty, if she was the wife of one husband, washed the feet of the saints and helped the needy. But he said of young women to "marry, bear children, rule the house."
An excellent lesson for a wife and mother to create comfort in the house, to be a mistress. Pleasant household trifles are very important.
My mother died before I was six years old. I remember the cake she made for my fifth birthday. On the top of it, my name was written in small drops of cinnamon - my last birthday cake until the very day of the wedding!
“God brings the lonely into the house” (Ps. 67:7). Aren't you excited to hatch out of an egg and look for your own worms like a two week old chick? God places us in families. He gives us people who love and understand us.
Thanks be to God for the women who make the house a piece of heaven! Home is the most like heaven in this world because people love you when you fail, love you when you fail. They think you're the best no matter what.
She is economical
The Bible says it's very economical. She saves money.
Comedian Art Backold spoke about a government department in a daily newspaper. Congress voted in favor of spending $31 billion. One person from the comedian's story asks another:
- How do we spend them?
- Let's build a building.
“So we have already built an unnecessary building worth three and a half million dollars.
But we need to do something with the allocated money.
Another says:
Well, I don't know what to tell you.
“Have you ever tried to spend a billion dollars in one day?” asks one of them.
— No, but my wife tried! another answers.
Thank God for a thrifty woman next to a pious husband! A man has peace and strength when he has a wife who takes care of his well-being, his bed, clothes, table, children.
God bless the righteous woman! One of her virtues is to create comfort in the house, to be a hostess.
She has a short speech
"He opens his mouth with wisdom, and gentle instruction is in her tongue." In my opinion, it is very good that God endowed a woman with the gift of speech, but not in order to say bad things.
A few years ago my father told me about a doctor's wife who lived near him in Decatur, Texas. "I've never known a woman who talks so much and yet doesn't say anything bad about anyone."
Is it possible to say about you: “A woman in whose tongue is gentle instruction?”
Do you want to be queen in your house? Then curb your tongue. Let him speak only words of love, grace, common sense, forgiveness and kindness. You can give tithing, go to prayer meetings, read the Bible, and appear devout, but a spiky tongue will bring it all to naught pretty quickly. God gives righteous women the following virtue: "gentle instruction in her tongue."
She wants kids
This is not surprising. Psalm 127:3 says, “This is an inheritance from the Lord: children; reward from Him is the fruit of the womb.” God, be merciful to women who want to have an abortion and get rid of a precious God-given child! Some women want to enjoy the pleasure of a wife while avoiding the duties of a mother; enjoy the pleasure of a depraved Hollywood woman, rather than accept the responsibility, joy and duties of a virtuous wife and mother. The Bible says, “This is an inheritance from the Lord: children; reward from Him is the fruit of the womb. Like arrows in the hand of a strong man, so are young sons. Blessed is the man who filled his quiver with them!” (Ps. 126:3-5). My daughter Joy and her husband Roger have six children: three boys and three girls. When the sixth child was born, Roger sent a small postcard "My sixth arrow in the quiver." Some will say, "Oh, Brother Roger, no one should have more than one or two children these days." Who said that? Not God. Do you want Gentiles to inhabit the earth? Do you want the number of drunkards, lechers, apostates to multiply in the world? What a stupid idea! God wants Christians to raise their children in godly families.
Susanna Wesley had nineteen children. By today's standards, seventeen extra. Thirteenth in line was John Wesley, the founder of the Methodist movement, who wrote six thousand hymns, magnificent songs of faith that are sung by millions of people. Do you think Susanna Wesley had too many children? Would you like it to stop before John Wesley was born, the thirteenth in a row, and before Charles, the seventeenth in a row, was born? She not only gave birth to nineteen children, but also raised each of them for God. She told her husband, “It is necessary for us, our servants, and children to have a family altar for Bible study and instruction. And if you don't do it, then I will. And when he didn't, she did. She devoted one hour a week and taught each child to retell everything that he remembered during the week. “I noticed that you did this and that. You need to fix this." One hour a week spent with each child! As a result, these children have become quite intelligent, haven't they?
Virtuous women, make motherhood your profession, your life's work. Dr. Bob Jones Sr. was his mother's eleventh child. If they stopped at ten, they wouldn't have a preacher in their family. Do you think Mrs. Jones had too many children? Others died in infancy, but my father's eighth surviving child was Dr. Bill Rice. Do you think my father had too many children? I tell you, Christians should bring up righteous people for God.
And the children of such a woman grow up and call her "blessed."
2. Other great women of the Bible.
In the Bible, many righteous women wanted children.
Jacob was deceived. A girl, Leah, was put in his bed, and he didn't know it until morning. Laban later gave him Rachel, his chosen one. God took care of Leah because she was less loved. He gave her children; but Rachel did not give birth. Rachel became jealous of her sister and said to her husband Jacob, “Give me children; and if not, I die." He replied, "Am I God?" But God remembered Rachel, opened her womb, and she gave birth to Joseph and Benjamin. Ninety-year-old Sarah prayed for a child! And when at last God gave her Isaac, she said: “God made me laugh; whoever hears of me will laugh.” He was named Isaac, which means "laughter." One of my daughters is named Grace (grace), the other Joy (joy). Yes, Christian children should bring great happiness and be desired. If I grew up with non-rumours, like some of you, I would be happy to get them out of the house and send them to school, as some of you do. In the summer, you can't wait for your kids to go to camp. I, too, would like to send them out of sight if I brought up people like you, undisciplined, without a family altar, who have no idea of \u200b\u200bfriendship.
Our family loves to get together. We meet twice a year - in the summer and at Christmas: six daughters, six sons-in-law and a bunch of grandchildren. Married grandchildren bring their spouses. Those who only meet, also come. So there are sixty people or more at Christmas—boys sleeping on couches, others on the floor in sleeping bags, in my carpentry shop and in rented apartments.
Parents should enjoy their children; and if they are well brought up, then you will really get it. Teach them to live for God and you will be happy and proud of them. The godly women of the Bible wanted children. Anna prayed for Samuel. Elkana, Anna's husband, had another wife, Fennana, who had children. When she taunted Anna and said, "I have children, but you can't give birth," it broke Anna's heart. She turned to God in prayer. As she wept, her husband said, “Am I not better than ten sons for you? And you are my beloved wife. But this did not console Anna. She wanted a boy, and therefore went to pray in the temple. During the prayer, "her mouth only moved, and her voice was not heard." Elderly Eli, the high priest, thought she was drunk and said, "Get out of your wine."
Then she answered: “No, my lord; I am a woman grieving in spirit; I have not drunk wine or strong drink, but I pour out my soul before the Lord.”
Eli replied, "The God of Israel will fulfill your request." After that, Anna went home, “and Elkan knew Anna his wife, and the Lord remembered her” (1 Samuel 1:19). She conceived and gave birth to Samuel. Oh, how glad she was! She promised God – “and I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life” (1 Samuel 1:28). What a wonderful idea! Biblical women wanted children.
Here's a good way to provide preachers!
Zechariah, an elderly priest, served in the temple. Once he and his wife were there. They prayed for a very long time. Both must have been in their seventies, well beyond their childbearing years; but they prayed. An angel appeared in the temple. Zechariah, seeing him, was embarrassed. But the angel said, “Fear not, Zacharias, for your prayer has been heard, and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you will call his name John” (Luke 1:13). Zechariah replied, “By what do I know this? for I am old, and my wife is advanced in years. The angel assured him that the child would certainly be born. Zechariah knew that Elizabeth prayed that the child would become a priest like his father, become a person pleasing to God. So the Lord said, “He will be great before the Lord; he will not drink wine and strong drink, and the Holy Spirit will be filled even from his mother's womb; and he will turn many of the children of Israel to the Lord their God” (Luke 1:15-16).
Don't you know that she rejoiced at John the Baptist, the spirit-filled, soul-winning, godly preacher God gave in answer to prayer! Prayer is a way of acquiring and raising children.
I once preached on John the Baptist at a conference at Bob Jones University. I said, “Why don't you ask God to give you a boy and promise Him that you'll raise him strict on the family altar, bring the child to salvation and instruct him in the Word; then send him off to college and train him to be a preacher?” I said, "How many of you are willing to promise God that if He sends you a boy, you'll make him a soul-catcher and a preacher?" A number of people stood up, including an evangelist named Perkins. He was married for 14 years and they had no children. The others got up too. It was in the spring. That fall, while I was in Greenville talking with Dr. Harold Saitler, this man came up and said, "Brother Rice, we're expecting a boy!" "How do you know it's a boy?" "Because I prayed for a boy."
He was due to be born in February. He was going to be named Joel, and he was to become a Baptist preacher. And of course, in February the child was born. It was a boy and they named him Joel! Later, with Dr. John Waters were in Lawrence, South Carolina. He said, "Dr. Rice, remember when you preached at Bob Jones University about John the Baptist? My wife and I got up. The boy standing here was born a year later, and he is the joy of my heart. He has dedicated his life to service, and he is already winning souls.” (Then he was seventeen). What a wonderful answer to prayer!
The Bible gives many examples of people praying for children. The Lord is pleased when a woman wants to become a mother, when she wants a godly boy or girl to serve as a blessing and comfort in the house and begin to win souls. I was in Sacramento, California, at Highland Baptist Church. After the morning service, I left the pulpit and went to the coffee table. A woman came up to me and said, “Brother Rice, my name is Barbara (I can't remember my last name). You don't know me, but you know my husband. Seven years ago, when you and Dr. Hillsom were in Fresno, California, preaching a sermon on prayer. My husband asked me to pray for us. We were married for seven years, but had no children. You then prayed well. And this woman, seven years later, said, "Brother Rice, after 269 days (nine months minus one day), this boy was born."
She pointed to a six-year-old child and said, "Whenever I thank God for this boy, I thank Him for your prayer for us." A woman's desire to become a mother is biblical. This is pleasing to God, because he intended a woman to become a mother. One day, near Bill Rice's ranch, a young couple said, "Brother Rice, we've been married for years and want a baby badly." We immediately stopped and prayed. They returned the following year. The husband said, "Do you remember praying with us last year?" He reached out and touched his wife's belly. “Now she is with a child!” Listen, godly women prayed and God gave them children. Not a bad idea for us, is it? We would have more good preachers if we had such praying fathers and mothers.
My father and mother consecrated me to God as a preacher.
Can I tell you about my mother? My mother died when I was five years old. One weekend when I was twenty-four, I went to Amarillo, Texas to see my mother's little sister, my aunt Essie. She had a pleasant voice, viola, and I sang along with her. She brought me a letter and said, "John, I think you'd like to take a look at this letter." “Looks like my mother's handwriting. I saw some of her love letters to her father,” I said. Aunt Essie replied, "Yes, it's from your mother." She had been dead for eighteen or nineteen years. I was currently at Wayland College in Plainview, Texas and was a football coach. I have read it. We lived in South Texas in Atascosa County, not far from San Antonio. My mother wrote: “It is very hot and dry here. This year is not a very good harvest. Willie is not well (to my father). Let me tell you about little Porter (child). He has two new teeth. I feel good with Gertrude. She takes care of the baby and wipes the dishes. She becomes a real helper (she is seven or eight years old). Ruth is very calm and sweet (she is now a retired teacher living in Texas). And George plays pranks from morning till night (He always was. He was the principal of a high school in Crystal City, Texas and went Home not so long ago to be with the Lord). But let me tell you about my boy preacher. I said to Aunt Essie, “Wait a minute! Aunt Essie, she's already told about everyone else. And now she's talking about me as "her boy preacher!" Aunt Essie said, "She never called you anything else."
Surprised, I said, “I didn't know that. I only remember when I was four or five years old and people asked: "Son, what's your name?" I always answered: "John the Baptist-preacher" (Someone taught me this). When I got back to Decatur to see my dad, I said, “Dad, I saw Mom’s letter and she called me preacher boy. I did not know about it".
He said, "Yes, when you were born, we were so glad we had a boy that we dedicated you to God and asked Him to make you a preacher." I said, “So why didn't you tell me? I think I'm wasting my time." The Lord really spoke to me and soon I began to serve. And I know that many revelations in my soul and responsibility for souls came because my mother gave me into the hands of God, as did the mother of John the Baptist.
How beautiful is the influence of a godly mother!
Anna was the woman who gave birth to Samuel. The aged priest Eli was a good man, but he spoiled his children. These boys were unbridled and unconverted and had no reverence for offerings. The Lord said, "He knew how his sons were wicked, and he did not restrain them" (1 Samuel 3:13). They committed adultery with the women that came to the tabernacle, and God killed these guys for their behavior. Being in such an environment, in the temple where Anna brought him, Samuel nevertheless remained pure and righteous, God's prophet; I think thanks to my mother.
Anna must have taken care of him until she nursed him. This does not mean until the end of his breastfeeding, but until he is old enough to live separately from his mother, maybe at the age of four or five or six. She then took him to the temple and brought him new clothes every year. Oh, this godly woman made a righteous man out of him during the years he spent with her and during his visits to the temple. Being inside the family, next to strangers, surrounded by wicked priests, Samuel nevertheless remained faithful. Oh, the influence of a pious mother! This also applies to Suzanne Wesley.
Paul wrote to Timothy: “Recalling your unfeigned faith, which formerly dwelt in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice; I am sure that it is in you” (2 Tim. 2:5). Then he said, “Besides, from childhood you have known the sacred scriptures, which are able to make you wise unto salvation” (2 Tim. 3:15). Timothy learned this from his pious mother and grandmother. His father was Greek and possibly pagan. The Bible does not say that he was a Christian. I know that Timothy was uncircumcised until he started preaching, he was circumcised by Paul. Therefore, we believe that his old father may not have been a Christian. But Timothy had a godly mother and grandmother who taught him the Bible and faith in the Lord.
Oh, the influence of a pious mother! I wonder why we don't sing "Tell Mother I'll Be There" as often as we used to: "When I was just a small child, as far as I remember, I upset my mother so much with my misdeeds and disobedience; and now that she has gone to heaven, I miss her tender care. Oh Savior, tell my mother that I will be there. Tell mom that I'll be there for her prayers. Bring her, blessed Savior, this message! Tell mother I'll be there to share heavenly joy with her; yes, tell my dear mother that I will be there.” And I know why. If children have a smoking mother with short hair, wearing pants or shorts, the children will not want to say to such a mother, "Yes, tell my dear mother that I will be there." But young people will sing this to an old-fashioned mother who loves the Lord, reads the Bible, wins her children for Christ, prays with them, and loves them. Boys go to heaven because they have godly mothers.
Oh, the influence of a pious mother!
Laya is the aunt of the prophet Yusuf, peace be upon him
The Qur'an mentions that when Yusuf, peace be upon him, became the ruler of Egypt and a drought set in, all his brothers came to him with a request for food. (They did not know at the time that it was their brother whom they had thrown into the well.) Then Yusuf, peace be upon him, revealed to them who he really was, and gave them his shirt to throw it over the eyes of their father - Ya'kub, peace be upon him. And he told them to return with their families.
When Yusuf's shirt touched their father's eyes, his sight returned. Then they left their native country and went to Egypt to meet Yusuf, peace be upon him. When they entered to him, Yusuf, peace be upon him, seated his father and aunt on his royal throne. He did so out of respect for them. Then the two of them and all his brothers fell on their faces before Yusuf, peace be upon him. In those days, bowing to the ground as a greeting (salama) was allowed. Now it is prohibited.
As for the fact that in the Qur'an this woman is called his mother, then - in fact - the mother of the prophet Yusuf, peace be upon him, died, and the prophet Ya'kub then married this woman. Other scholars said that this refers to the mother of Yusuf, peace be upon him, whose name was Rachel. When they bowed to the ground, Yusuf, peace be upon him, said: "This is a dream come true that I had in my childhood." He had a dream in which the sun, moon and eleven stars bowed down to him.
Lesson:
How righteous this woman must have been that the prophet had such respect for her!
Musa's mother, peace be upon him
Her name was Yuhaned. When the priests informed the Pharaoh that a boy would be born in Bani Israel who would rebel against him, Pharaoh issued a decree saying that all boys born in Bani Israel should be killed. And thousands of children were killed. And at that time Musa was born, peace be upon him. Allah inspired his mother that she should continue to breastfeed him and when she feels fear for his life, she will have to put the child in a box and let this box float on the river. And when Allah wills, He will bring him back to her. So she did, and Allah fulfilled His promise.
Lesson:
O women! See how she relied on Allah and how she trusted Him - and what results it brought.
Musa's sister, peace be upon him
Some scholars say that her name was Maryam, and others that her name was Kulsum. When Musa's mother, peace be upon him, sent a box with a child to float on the river, she told her daughter to watch that box - what would become of it. The box floated down the river and sailed to the Pharaoh's palace. When they took her out of the water, they found a beautiful baby in her. Pharaoh wanted to kill this child. But his wife, who was a righteous woman and believed in Allah, saved the child's life.
Husband (Pharaoh) and wife decided to take the child to raise, and they needed a nurse for Musa, peace be upon him. However, he refused the milk of all nurses who offered their services. Nobody knew what to do. Then the sister of Musa, peace be upon him, came to them and said that she would show a kind and good nurse, whose milk is also very good. And she took them to the mother of Musa, peace be upon him. His mother was called and the baby was handed over to her. So Allah fulfilled His promise to return it to her.
Lesson:
Pay attention to her mind. She found him and risked her life, doing the behavior of her mother, but the enemies did not guess anything. O women! Obedience to parents, intelligence and piety are great virtues.
Musa's wife, peace be upon him
Her name was Safura and she was the eldest daughter of Shu'aib, peace be upon him. When Musa, peace be upon him, accidentally killed an unbeliever in Egypt, the Pharaoh was informed about it. And he told his advisers that Musa, peace be upon him, must be killed. When Musa, peace be upon him, found out about this, he secretly went to Madyan. When he reached the borders of this city, he saw how the shepherds got water from the well and watered their sheep. And he also saw two women sitting at a distance from the shepherds. (The eldest of them became his wife, and the second became his sister-in-law).
Seeing them, he asked why they could not water their flock. They replied: “We have no men in the house. That is why we work alone. We are women and therefore we are waiting for all these men to leave. When they leave, we get water from the well.” He took pity on them, got water for them himself and watered the sheep. When they returned home, they told their father, who was already old, about it. He sent his eldest daughter to call this noble man to them.
She came to Musa, peace be upon him, and behaved with all modesty, and told him that her father was calling him. He came with her and met Shu'aib, peace be upon him. He said that he wanted to marry him one of his daughters, but made a condition that Musa, peace be upon him, should look after his sheep for eight or ten years. Musa, peace be upon him, accepted the proposal and married the eldest daughter of the prophet Shu'aib, peace be upon him. Ten years later, he returned home with her to Egypt. It was cold during their journey and they needed fire. Musa, peace be upon him, noticed the fire on Mount Tur and went towards it. When he climbed it, he saw the nur of Allah. It was there that he received a prophetic mission.
Lesson:
Look at how difficult it was for her to do household chores. When she had to speak to a stranger, how restlessly and modestly she spoke! O women! You, too, should stop looking for convenience in life. You need not be lazy and do your household chores and duties. In addition, you must always be modest and shy.
Musa's sister-in-law, peace be upon him
She has been talked about before. Her name was Safira. She also worked around the house with her sister. She obeyed her father and took care of him.
Lesson:
O women! You, too, have to take care of your parents and work around the house like the poor do. Do not consider household chores below your dignity. Obviously, you are no more worthy than the daughters of the prophet.
From the book "Behishti Zevar" ("Paradise Patterns") by Mavlana Ashraf Ali Sanvi
Translated from English by Malika Umm Yahya.
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All information on this site is published outside the scope of missionary activity and is intended exclusively for Muslims! The views and opinions published in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the site administration
Translation from Arabic Abdullah I.E.
Translation editor Kuliev E.R.
"How to Become a Righteous Wife"- Baku, "Nurlar", 2001, 32 p.
The book describes the relationship between spouses in a Muslim family and the moral image of a believing woman, who, being an ideal wife, contributes to the formation of a healthy family and a prosperous society. It is intended for a wide range of readers and is of particular interest to devout Muslim women.
In the name of Allah, the Merciful, the Merciful!
Foreword
Praise be to Allah, whom we praise and ask for help and forgiveness. We seek refuge in Allah from the evil delusions of our souls and sinful deeds. Indeed, no one will lead astray the one whom Allah guides to the straight path, and no one will guide the one whom Allah leads astray from this path. I testify that there is no deity except Allah alone, who has no partners, and I testify that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
This pamphlet is an appeal to every woman who has her hopes in Allah and the Hereafter. This pamphlet describes the features that should be inherent in a righteous wife, taken from the Holy Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, as well as the sayings of the early Muslims, may Allah be pleased with them, and some Muslim theologians. Muslim women should adopt these qualities and act in accordance with these instructions. The Almighty said: « There is no choice for a believing man or woman in any matter if Allah and His Messenger have already made a decision. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger is in clear error ».
The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: "All my followers will enter Paradise, except for those who refuse." The people asked: “O Messenger of Allah! And who can refuse? He said: "Whoever obeys me will enter Paradise, and whoever disobeys me, he refuses."
I ask Allah to make this work useful for me and all other Muslims and make it sincere before His noble face. I also ask that it be preserved for the day when wealth and children will not benefit anyone except those who stand before Allah with a pure heart. And in conclusion, let us give praise to Allah, the Lord of the worlds!
Dominance of a man over a woman
“Men are the guardians of women, because Allah has given some people an advantage over others, and because husbands spend [on the maintenance of wives] funds from their property.”
Ibn Kathir, in the interpretation of this verse, said: “The guardianship of a man is manifested in the fact that he is the master and master of a woman and educates her when her character begins to bend.”
This is confirmed by the following words of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him: “If I could order to bow down to someone other than Allah, I would order a woman to bow down to her husband. I swear by Him in whose hand is the soul of Muhammad! A woman will not fulfill her duties to her Lord until she fully fulfills her duties to her husband. She should not refuse him, even if she is in childbirth.
Allah Almighty said: “Virtuous women are devoted [to Allah and their husbands] and keep in the absence of their husbands what Allah ordered to save.”
Imam Ibn Taymiyyah, may Allah have mercy on him, interpreted this verse as follows: “A virtuous woman is one who always obeys her husband. After fulfilling her duties to Allah and His Messenger, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, nothing is more important for a woman than the fulfillment of her duties to her husband.
Modern women should pay attention to these instructions. To an even greater extent, this applies to those women who transgress the boundaries of what is permitted, behave like men, and try to control their husbands. These women do whatever they want. They lead a promiscuous life and call themselves fighters for the freedoms and rights of women. But in reality they are women who prefer the life of the world to the life to come.
My sister! Be careful and don't go astray. Do not follow in the footsteps of such women, for a day awaits you, from the horror of which even children will turn gray.
Natural features that give a husband advantages over a woman
Allah Almighty has placed innate qualities in men and women that provide men with a certain dominance over women.
A righteous wife is the best of worldly goods
In the collection of authentic hadiths of Imam Muslim, it is reported that ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr said that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “Worldly goods are a temporary pleasure, the best of which is a righteous wife.”
In the collections of al-Bukhari and Muslim, it is also reported that Abu Hurayrah said that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “A woman is married because of four qualities: property, genealogy, beauty or piety. Get one that is pious, or your hands will be covered with dust."
It is also reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Happiness lies in four things: a righteous wife, a spacious dwelling, a righteous neighbor and a convenient means of transportation. Unhappiness also lies in four things: a bad wife, a bad neighbor, a bad vehicle and a cramped home.
The Sunnah is replete with such messages, from which the importance of choosing a righteous spouse becomes clear. It also means that a Muslim woman must have noble qualities in order to be among those with whom Allah is pleased. Muslim sister! These are the qualities of a noble wife in the form in which they are mentioned in the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, as well as the sayings of our righteous ancestors, may Allah Almighty be pleased with them. Try to remember these qualities and cultivate them in yourself. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Knowledge is acquired only through study, and prudence is acquired through patience. Whoever tries to acquire something will get it.”
Qualities of a Righteous Wife
Almighty and all-good Allah said: “Virtuous women are devoted [to Allah and their husbands] and keep in the absence of their husbands what Allah ordered to save.”
Ibn Kathir in the interpretation of this verse said: “Ibn ‘Abbas and many other interpreters believed that we are talking about women who are submissive to their husbands. Al-Suddi and other interpreters believed that further we are talking about women who protect the honor and property of their husbands in their absence.
It is reported that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “If a woman performs five prayers, fasts in Ramadan, observes chastity and obeys her husband, then she will be told: “Enter Paradise through the gate through which you wish!”
It is also narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Your wives will be among the inhabitants of Paradise if they are loving, often give birth and look after their husbands. And if such a wife sees her husband angry, she will put her hand on his hand and say: “I will not close my eyes until you are satisfied.”
Imam al-Nasai's collection of hadith also reports that Abu Hurairah said that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, was asked: "Which wife is the best?" He replied: “She who pleases her husband when he looks at her, who obeys him when he commands her, and who does not do or spend her property in a way that does not please him.”
Muslim sister! Check if you have such traits, and if not, then try to acquire them in order to win the favor of Allah. Do it for yourself, your husband and your children, for a calm and happy life on earth and after death.
Once the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, asked a certain woman: “Do you have a husband?” She replied: "Yes." He asked, "Is he pleased with you?" She replied, "He's only angry because I can't do anything." Then he said: "Be more attentive to him, because he is your hell and paradise."
From all that has been said, it can be concluded that a righteous wife should be (1) pious, i.e. do good deeds and fulfill their duties to the Lord; (2) obedient to her husband in that which the Almighty and All-good Allah has not forbidden; (3) protecting her own honor, especially in the absence of her husband; (4) frugal with the property of her husband and her children; (5) striving for her husband to always see her only beautiful, smart and smiling; (6) trying to please her husband when he is angry with her, because the husband is heaven and hell for the wife; (7) not resisting her husband when he desires her. If a woman fulfills these instructions, then paradise is promised to her through the mouth of the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him. That is why the hadith says: “If a woman performs five prayers, fasts Ramadan, observes chastity and obeys her husband, then she will be told: “Enter Paradise through the gate through which you wish!”
lovely wife
(according to the book “Tabai ‘an-Nisa”
Ibn ‘Abd Rabbiha al-Andalusi)
Haytham ibn ‘Adi at-Tai said that Mujahid told from the words of ash-Shabi that one day Shuraikh said to him: “O Shabi! You should marry a Tamim woman. They are very smart." He asked: "What is their intelligence?" Shureikh said: “One day I was returning from a funeral in the afternoon and passed by their settlements. There I met an old woman standing near the door. Next to her stood a girl, the most beautiful I have ever seen in my life. I approached and asked for a drink, although I was not at all thirsty. “What do you want to drink?” - asked the old woman. I replied: "Something." She said, "Hurry, girl! Bring him some milk! In my opinion, this man is not local.” I asked, "Who is this girl?" She replied: “This is Zeinab, the daughter of Jarir. She is from the Khanzala family.” I asked, "Is she free or busy?" The old woman answered: "Free." Then I said, "Marry her to me." “If you match,” the old woman replied in the Tamim dialect. I went home to rest, but sleep left me. When I performed the midday prayer, I took the hands of my brothers, respected reciters of the Koran ‘Alqama, al-Aswad, al-Musayab and Musa ibn ‘Arfata. With them I went to meet the girl's uncle. He met me and asked: “O Abu Umayya! What do you want?" I replied, "I want to marry Zeinab, your brother's daughter." He said, "She wouldn't refuse to marry you either." And then he married me to her. That's when I remembered the hard-heartedness of the women of the Tamim tribe and regretted what I had done. I said to myself: “What will I do with the Tamim women? I'd rather divorce her." But then I said, “No, I'd rather hold her close. Maybe I'll be happy. And if not, I will do as I please.” If you could see, Sha'bi, how the women instructed her when they brought her to me. According to the Sunnah, if a wife comes to her husband, he should get up and perform a prayer of two rak'ats, and then ask Allah to grant him the good that is in his wife, and ask Allah to protect him from the evil that is in her . I performed the prayer and ended it with the words of greeting. Then I noticed that she was praying behind me, and when I finished praying, the slave girls came to me, took my clothes and put on me a dark yellow shirt. When the house was empty, I went up to her and put my hand on her waist. She said, “Wait, Abu Umayya! Stay where you are." Then she said: “Praise be to Allah, whom I praise and ask for help! Blessings to Muhammad and his family! I don't know you and I don't know your character. Tell me what you like about me sticking to it and what you don't like about me moving away from it." And she said, “You were already married to your people, and so was I. But what happened was what Allah had ordained. Now I am yours, and therefore do as Allah commands you: keep it in a good way or let it go in peace. Here's what I wanted to say. And I ask forgiveness from Allah for myself and for you!”
Shureikh continued: “O Shabi! She forced me to turn to her with the words: “Praise be to Allah, whom I praise and ask for help! Peace and blessings be upon the Prophet and his family! You spoke great words. If you adhere to them, you will receive a good lot. But if you turn away from them, it will turn against you. I love things like this and I don't like things like that. Now we are together, and therefore there is no need to distinguish between us. If you see something good, then spread it. And if you see something bad, then cut it.” Then she said something, but I don't remember it anymore. She also asked: “How do you perceive the visits of relatives?” I said, "I don't like it when in-laws start bothering me." She asked, “Which of your neighbors do you want to let in? I will let them in. And those whom you do not love, I will not love either. I said, "That family is honest, that one is bad." Oh Shabi! That night I slept happy. After that, she lived with me for a year, and I did not see anything bad from her. At the beginning of the next year, I returned home from a meeting of the Sharia court and saw an old woman there who was in charge of our house. I asked, "Who is this?" They told me: "This is your mother-in-law." At that moment, I forgot everything I felt. Then I sat down facing the old lady. She said: "Peace be with you, Abu Umayya!" I replied: “Peace be with you too! Who are you?" She said: "I am your mother-in-law." I said: “May Allah bring you even closer!” She asked: "How do you like your wife?" I replied: "Beautiful wife!" She said, “O Abu Umayya! A woman is not bad if there are two reasons: if she gave birth to a son or if she received the recognition of her husband. If you begin to be tormented by doubts, then take up the whip. I swear by Allah! There is nothing worse in a man's house than a spoiled wife." I said: “By Allah! You gave her a good upbringing.” She asked: “Do you want your mother-in-law to come to you?” I said, "Whenever you want." She came to me at the beginning of every year and gave good advice. I lived with my wife for twenty years without reproaching her for anything. And only once I reproached her, but I acted unfairly. Here is how it was. The muezzin announced the beginning of the prayer after we performed two rak'ats of the voluntary prayer. Then I was the imam of the whole village. Suddenly I noticed the approach of a scorpion. I took the dishes and covered him, and then I said: “Zeynab! Don't move until I come." If you could see, Sha'bi! When I returned from prayer, I found that the scorpion had already stung her. I asked everyone to calm down and that they bring me salt. I tapped her finger and then began to recite the Surahs al-Fatiha, al-Falyak and An-Nas.”
Circumstances to watch out for in your relationship with your husband
1. Husband's anger.
The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “The prayers of three people do not rise above their ears: a runaway slave until he returns; the woman who falls asleep when her husband is angry with her; and a ruler with whom his people are displeased.
2. Causing suffering to the husband.
Imam Ahmad and other experts on hadith narrated a hadith from the words of Mu'adh, which reports that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “When a wife causes her husband suffering in this world, then his wives from among the huris say:“ Don't torture him! May Allah destroy you! He is only a guest with you, and very soon he will part with you in order to come to us. ”
3. Showing ingratitude for the kindness of her husband.
Imam Muslim, in his collection of authentic hadiths, reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I have seen hell, and never before have I seen it like this. I also saw that most of its inhabitants are women.” He was asked: “O Messenger of Allah! Why?" He replied: "For their ingratitude." He was asked: “Are they ungrateful to Allah?” He replied: “They are ungrateful to their husbands and ungrateful for the favors they receive. If you do good to one of these women for a whole year, and then she remains dissatisfied with one thing, she says: “I have never seen good from you.”
4. Demanding a divorce without good reason.
At-Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud narrated the hadeeth of Sauban, which reports that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “If a woman asks her husband for a divorce without a good reason, then she will be deprived of the opportunity to feel even the fragrance of paradise.”
5. Submission to the husband in disobedience to Allah.
Ahmad and al-Hakim reported that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: "You cannot obey the creation, disobeying the Creator."
It is appropriate to recall that Satan instructs some women to disobey their husbands in those things that are not prohibited by Sharia. May Allah guide such women to the straight path! When husbands command them to do something, they say: "This is not allowed, and this is forbidden." Thus they try to avoid obedience to their husbands. But they should remember the following saying of Allah Almighty: « On the Day of Resurrection you will see those who slandered Allah with blackened faces. Is there not a place in hell for the proud? »
Imam al-Hasan al-Basri said: “There is no doubt that slandering Allah and His Messenger, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, proclaiming the forbidden is lawful, and the forbidden is lawful, is an obvious disbelief.”
6. Voluntary fasting without the permission of the husband.
In an authentic hadith narrated by Muslim from the words of Abu Hurairah, it is reported that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “A woman can fast in the presence of her husband only with his permission.” If a woman observes a fast while her husband is not away, then this can prevent her husband from enjoying intimacy with her and push him to bad deeds. Of course, voluntary fasting is meant here, because obligatory fasting is a duty of a person to Allah, which is higher than a duty to a husband.
7. Refusal of intimacy with her husband.
It is reported that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “If a husband calls his wife to his bed and she does not come, after which he spends the night angry at her, then the angels will curse her until morning.”
8. Disclosure of secrets of intimate relationships.
It is reported that Asma bint Yazid said that once the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “Surely, one of the men sometimes talks about what he does with his wife, and for sure, one of the women tells, what does she do with her husband. The people fell silent, and then Asma said: “You are right, O Messenger of Allah! I swear by Allah that women act in this way, and men too. Then he said, “Don't do that! Indeed, it is like the devil meeting a she-devil on the road and having sexual intercourse with her in front of people.”
9. Taking off clothes in a strange house.
Imam Ahmad and other experts on hadith reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman takes off her clothes not in the house of her husband, then the great and mighty Allah will dishonor her.”
10. Receiving guests without the permission of the husband.
In the collection of authentic hadiths, al-Bukhari reported that Abu Hurairah narrated. That the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “It is not allowed for a woman to fast in the presence of her husband without his permission and let strangers into the house without his permission.”
11. Excommunication from home without the permission of the husband.
Allah Almighty and Almighty has said: "Don't leave your homes..."
Ibn Kathir, may Allah have mercy on him, in the interpretation of this verse said: “This means: do not leave the house without any need.”
If a woman is obliged to obey her husband, then this means that she does not have the right to leave her husband's house without his permission.
Husband Care
Muslim sister! I do not want to drag out this conversation and will give you a vivid example of how the companions of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, looked after their husbands. I hope this example will satisfy you.
In an authentic hadith narrated by Muslim, it is reported that Asma bint Abu Bakr said: “Zubair married me, having neither property nor slaves - nothing but his horse and a piece of land. I fed the horse with hay, took care and looked after him. I also ground oatmeal for dough, brought water and kneaded dough for bread. I did not know how to bake bread well, and therefore our neighbors from among the Ansar baked bread for us. They were trustworthy women." Asma also said: “I took seeds from the land that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, allocated Zubair. It was a plot the size of two-thirds of a farsakh.”
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman knew what her duties were to her husband, she would not sit down until he had lunch and dinner.”
Umm Akili's advice to his daughter
My daughter! You've been away from the home you grew up in and the nest you started walking in. You married a man you didn't know. He is your friend with whom you had no relationship. So become his slave so that he becomes your slave. Keep the ten commandments in your relationship with him so that they will help you in life. First and second, have a moderate respectful fear of him, obey him and obey him. Third and fourth - take an interest in what is pleasing to his eyes and his sense of smell, so that he does not see anything bad and smells only pleasant things. Fifth and sixth - ask where he sleeps and what he eats, because the heat of hunger irritates the husband, and the disturbance of sleep causes his anger. Seventh and eighth - take care of his property and take care of his servants and children. The most important thing in property is to evaluate it correctly, and in the family - to properly dispose of it.
Appeal to wives
All of the above was said in order to show the Muslim sisters the right path, established by the Almighty and all-good Allah in His writing and His Messenger, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, in the Sunnah. But this does not mean that the husband has the right to offend his wife or cause her suffering if she does not fulfill all her duties. It is reported that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “A believing man has no right to hate a believing woman. And if he is dissatisfied with one trait of her character, then he will definitely like the other trait.
O Muslim brother! If it seems to you that your wife is violating her duties or has a bad temper, you should first try to correct her with advice and good instructions. You must also remind her of Allah and terrify her with God's punishment. But if she is stubborn and continues to commit sins, then stop sleeping with her in the same bed. But do not leave her alone in the house, because the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: "If you avoid closeness with her, then do it in the same house." If she reforms, then it will do her good, and if not, then you should continue to give her instructions and avoid sexual intercourse with her. Almighty and all-good Allah said: “And those women whose disobedience you fear, exhort, avoid in the marital bed and strike. If they obey you, do not hurt them."
Ibn Kathir said: “The command to hit wives means that the husband has the right to lightly hit his wife if the instructions and separation in bed did not help her improve. In an authentic hadith narrated by Muslim from the words of Jabir, it is reported that during the farewell pilgrimage, the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “Fear Allah and take care of your wives, because they are your helpers. They must obey you and not let those who you do not like into the house. But if they do otherwise, beat them lightly. But don't forget that you have to feed and clothe them." Ibn ‘Abbas and many other interpreters said that hitting wives should be light. Al-Hasan al-Basri said that one should beat one's wife without leaving marks."
A husband should be careful not to hit his wife in the face, even if he does it lightly, because the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: "Do not hit her in the face."
Wife's rights
The husband should perform his duties to his wife, just as he wants his wife to perform her duties to him. Therefore, he should not harm her and touch her feelings. Imam Ahmad in the collection “al-Musnad” narrated the hadith from the words of Hakim ibn Mu’awiya al-Kusheyri, who said that his father once said: “O Messenger of Allah! What are the obligations of a husband to his wife? He said: “You must feed her if you eat yourself, dress her if you dress yourself. Do not hit her in the face, and if you avoid being close to her, then do it in the same house.
And in a hadith transmitted by al-Bukhari, Muslim and other experts on hadith from the words of ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr ibn al-‘As, it is reported that the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “O ‘Abdullah! I was told that you fast during the day and pray at night.” He said, "Yes, O Messenger of Allah!" He said, "Don't do that. Fast and break your fast. Pray at night and sleep. Verily, you must fulfill your duties towards the body, the eyes and the wife.”
It is also reported that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: “Whoever has two wives, but bows to one of them, he will appear with a crooked side on the Day of Judgment.”
Everything we have said is a very brief summary of the topic under discussion, but this did not prevent us from touching on the main relationship between spouses.
I ask the Almighty and All-good Allah, through His beautiful names and majestic qualities, to make this work useful for me and all other Muslims. I also ask Him that all husbands become witnesses of how unselfishly their wives fulfill their duties to them. But this does not mean that if one of the spouses sees flaws in the other, then he should respond in kind. By no means! Each of the spouses will certainly be held accountable to Allah for the fulfillment of their duties to their life partner.
Conclusion
We advise men to fear Allah, be fair to their wives and treat them with respect. This is what the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, bequeathed when he said: “Treat women well! Verily, a woman is made of a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is its upper part. If you want to straighten it, you will break it. And if you leave it, it will remain crooked. So treat women well."
Good treatment of women implies courtesy, teaching Islam and patience, encouraging what Allah has commanded, and warning against all that is forbidden. Indeed, this can help them to enter Paradise, if it is the will of Allah. And now let us pray for the blessings of the servant of Allah and His Messenger, our master Muhammad and his family. And in conclusion, let us give praise to Allah, the Lord of the worlds!
الشروط الواجب توفرها في حجاب المرأة المسلمة
First requirement
Whole body coverage
Allah Almighty and Almighty has said: « Tell the believing women to lower their eyes and guard their chastity. Let them not show off their adornments, except for those that are visible; let them cover the neckline of their breasts with veils and show their beauty to no one but their husbands, or fathers, or fathers-in-law, or sons, or sons of their husbands, or their brothers, or sons of their brothers, or sons of their sisters, or their women, or their slaves, or servants from among men who are deprived of lust, or children who do not know about female nakedness; let them not thump their feet so that the hidden beauties become apparent. O believers! All turn to Allah with a prayer for forgiveness - perhaps you will be happy ».
The Almighty also said: “O Prophet! Tell your wives, your daughters, and the women of believing men to pull their veils tight. So they will be distinguished [from slaves and harlots] and will not be subjected to insults. Allah is Forgiving, Merciful."
Second requirement
The bedspread doesn't have to be attractive.
In the aforementioned verse from Sura An-Nur, it was noted that women should not show their beauty. The Arabic word “zinat” (lit. “beauty”) refers to all kinds of jewelry, as well as smart clothes that attract the attention of men. Of course, it is completely unacceptable that the Lord commanded women to cover some beauties with other ornaments. It follows from this that in the presence of strangers, a woman has no right to wear a veil with patterns or headdresses with precious stones. Men are not allowed to display such jewelry. Allah Almighty said: “Do not leave your homes, do not wear the ornaments of the old times of ignorance…”