An essay based on the novel by I. Goncharov “An Ordinary Story. Is it worth replacing feelings with reason?

How to live by reason or feelings?

How to live, mind or feelings? There are two poles in this question: reason and feelings. In the same way, two opposites in I. Goncharov’s novel “ An ordinary story" These are Alexander and Pyotr Ivanovich, feelings and reason.

Using Alexander as an example, we will look at a person who lives only by feelings. At the beginning of the novel, Alexander sees the whole world through “ pink glasses" It seems to him that everyone loves him, and he loves everyone. He believes in love until the grave and eternal friendship. But upon arrival in St. Petersburg, the lenses in his “glasses” crack, and he sees everything in a new, more natural light for that time. At the moment of Alexander's meeting with reality, his dreams and ideas are broken against the “stone wall” of reality and inflict mental wounds on him. The life of romance is not sweet, in it more grief than happiness. A romantic wants his whole life to be happy, and behind his continuous dreams he does not see true happiness and cannot rejoice at it. Such people cannot think soberly, and often because of this not only they, but also those around them suffer.

Now let's look at a person who lives only by reason, using the example of Pyotr Ivanovich. The life of such a person is boring and monotonous. He becomes a “machine” that is capable of working for a place in society and fortune, but has no soul and feelings. For such a “machine,” happiness lies in good condition, and grief lies in a large monetary loss. These “robots” even go to marriage if the bride is rich and has a position in society. People surrounding such a “machine” live very poorly, because the machine is not capable of sympathy and love, it can only give out “advice”, or more precisely, harsh, petrified phrases.

It is impossible to live only by feelings or reason. Those who live by feelings lack sobriety in their actions; they and their lives are like a fire that flared up brightly for a second and then went out irrevocably. Those who live by reason are like " Snow Queen"living in icy halls, where everything is dead and cold.

A person must combine both feelings and reason, only then can he live truly fully, creating comfort for himself and for those around him.

Happiness is a desired goal for most people. Everyone has their own idea about it. And the questions: “How should you live to be happy? By reason or feeling? Should feeling prevail over reason? Or is submission to the voice of reason the only path leading to happiness? - remain open. Writers and classics, who always correctly sensed the subtle soul of man, tried to find the answer.

Yes, Bazarov, main character works by I.S. Turgenev's "Fathers and Sons", of course, lived by reason, or rather even by reason. Analysis, reasoning, skepticism - these are his constant companions. Forbidding himself to feel, he also did not understand and did not appreciate the feelings of those around him (father and son Kirsanov, his parents). Even after he fell in love with Odintsova, the hero continued to live, thinking through his every next step. Frightened by his feelings, he chose to hide behind indifference and cynicism. Captivated by Anna Sergeevna’s beauty, he remarks vulgarly: “Such a rich body! At least now to the anatomical theater! And later, appreciating her intelligence, he rudely refers to her as “a woman with a brain.”

But cynicism is a poor defense for a suffering soul. And in the end, having never found happiness, Bazarov falls into a state of blues, indifference to own life, which leads to his early death.

But is it only the mind that can lead to misfortune? Maybe feelings and emotions can also plunge a person into a state of despair?

L.N. Tolstoy in his novel War and Peace shows us in many episodes that this is so. A storm of feelings, emotions, the desire to love and be loved overwhelmed Natasha Rostova when Anatol Kuragin began to court her, waiting for her fiancé, Andrei Bolkonsky. Without realizing it, she was ready to run away with him from her home, into the unknown, leaving behind her fiancé, her parents, her honor, her former life. Undoubtedly, such actions could not lead to good. Subsequently, she bitterly regretted what she had done. But who knows whether she would have been able to live at all, whether she would have forgiven herself if she had nevertheless run away, succumbing to emotions? Yielding to a sudden impulse, a vague hope of happiness?

However, there are examples in literature when heroes find happiness by living mainly either by reason or by feelings. Thus, in Goncharov’s novel “Oblomov,” the rational Stolz and the emotional Oblomov, despite differences in upbringing, beliefs, behavior, and attitude to life, eventually found a family, peace of mind, and became happy.

So what is the best way to live? By reason? Feelings? Or find harmony between them?

I think the latter is closer to the truth. It is important to understand when you can give free rein to your feelings, and when you need to follow the voice of reason. This is the only way a person can live in harmony with himself, and therefore be truly happy.

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Essay by Anastasia Koshkina

“If we assume that human life can be controlled by reason, then the very possibility of life will be destroyed.” (L. Tolstoy)

Throughout a person's life, reason and feeling play important role. Reason is given so that a person can analyze his actions, control his actions, restrain excessive emotions, and warn a person against rash actions. The mind always weighs everything. And feeling is the highest form of a person’s emotional relationship to everything that surrounds him. What is more important for a person: reason or feeling? How should a person live? Be guided by reason or give free rein to your feelings?

The search for answers to these questions occupied the minds of poets and writers. Heroes of many literary works often found themselves faced with a choice between the dictates of feeling and the prompting of reason.

Let's turn to the novel by I.S. Turgenev "Fathers and Sons". Bazarov and Odintsova... Before meeting Odintsova, Bazarov is a reasonable person, confident in his abilities, proud and purposeful. He is incapable of any feelings. This is unnecessary in his life, all this is romanticism. But as soon as Odintsova appears, the hero changes. He can no longer maintain self-control and composure and completely, without realizing it, plunges into a sea of ​​feelings. Not a trace remains of the cynicism characteristic of him (remember: “she’s not like other women”). He understands that feelings are beginning to prevail over reason. How does Turgenev show this in the novel? Bazarov goes into the forest, stamps his feet, breaks branches, as if he wants to suppress this feeling of love within himself, which burst out so unexpectedly and inopportunely. He realizes with indignation that he is becoming a romantic. Can he cope with himself? Hardly. He only pushes his feeling deeper. Bazarov runs away from love for his parents. Accidental infection with typhus leads to his death. Odintsova comes to him to say goodbye. And here the reader sees that Bazarov’s feelings still triumphed over reason. Seeing Odintsova, he allows himself to “fall apart.” Once Bazarov asked Arkady not to speak beautifully. The metaphor “blow on a dying lamp” clearly indicates that, it turns out, Bazarov also knows how to speak beautifully.

What about Odintsova? She is deprived of the feeling of love, as well as other feelings. In her relationship with Bazarov, her main concern was that all this might lead to something. Only reason prevails in her life. And at the end of the novel we see that Odintsova chooses calm image life, she gets married again and again without love.

One cannot help but recall another novel. This is an epic novel by L.N. Tolstoy "War and Peace". I would like to draw attention to the image of Natasha Rostova. Natasha's essence is love. This feeling visits her for the first time at the ball, where she meets Andrei Bolkonsky. But Natasha and Andrey are different people. He lives by reason, and she lives by feelings. You can’t reunite with Andrei right away - you have to wait a year, that’s what old Bolkonsky ordered. Could Natasha subordinate her feelings to reason in this situation? Probably not. She longs for love, she wants to be with Andrey. And they tell her that she has to wait. She must love now and be loved, and therefore begins to feel attracted to the handsome Anatoly Kuragin, and then decides to run away with him. This is where reason should have spoken. But no! Natasha listens only to her heart and makes a mistake, for which she paid dearly. I had to curb my feelings and stop. But Natasha is still too young to hear the voice of reason...

So, let's conclude. Reason and feelings go hand in hand. It is impossible to live by reason alone, because if a person is guided only by reason, then life will be monotonous, boring, and uninteresting. Only feelings can make life meaningful, rich, and bright.

Now let’s pay attention to the question of what exactly this condition gives us and why.

Navigation through the article “Here and now: what will we get if we live by feelings?”

What does the “Here and Now” state give us?

Firstly

Being “here and now” will give you the effectiveness of your reactions and actions. We have already said that it is impossible to predict everything 100%. How then to react to something that was not part of the plan, that did not go as you expected? If you are still in your own mind, ideas, fantasies, any deviation from the plan will plunge you into a stupor and generally slow down any action.

“I get lost when something goes “wrong”, I am speechless, I don’t know what to do, and often I just stand in silence, trying to collect my thoughts, and realizing that I look stupider every second... »

If you are in Here and now, you easily feel what you want this moment. And you can easily express your feelings about what is happening and act in accordance with your natural reactions. And, accordingly, if you are in contact with yourself, there will be no stupor or clouding of reason.

Many people are afraid that their reaction will be “inappropriate” or “wrong.” At sessions, hearing this, I always ask – wrong for what?

What kind of standards correct behavior are you following? Are you sure these standards are appropriate for this particular case? Why do you put standards above your feelings and your goals? Who told you and when? live by feelings– inadequate?

Naturally, we are forced to respect social boundaries, but they are quite simple in general.

Read the code administrative offenses– it does not involve many restrictions. Everything else is your own speculation about whether this particular group of people will consider you “normal.”

The most important thing here is that if you constantly think hard about how to react “correctly” in any society, then you will only increase your chances of a negative assessment. Because it’s hard to deal with a squeezed, tense, dejected and frightened person in any society.

Even if you try to hide your tension, no one has deprived those around you of their original ability to feel. And therefore, albeit unconsciously, any person next to you is able to grasp your true mood here and now.

Remember the example of cracking eggs. This applies to everything you do - work, sports, sex, household chores, creative expression, communication. If one part of you is here, the other is thinking about who will think what and how this or that might turn out, and the third is generally thinking about tomorrow’s meeting at work, it is unlikely that any of these actions will be quite effective.

Moreover, what is done in “autopilot” mode is poorly remembered. Even if this action does not require attention or special skill, you will then have difficulty remembering in detail what exactly you did and where, for example, you put this or that thing. Sometimes this kind of everyday absent-mindedness becomes an endless source of irritation and loss of time.

Secondly

By being “Here and Now” you will reduce the likelihood that it will be the same as before. When you are in your assumptions, your consciousness filters new possibilities, that is, it “does not notice” them. Look again at the scheme for reproducing the old experience.

If you don't expect anything specific, but actively notice everything that happens in Here and now, you begin to see new possibilities and live with new feelings. And react in a new way. And accordingly, you get new experience. Which is often much better than the old one.

Most people try to do a lot “ahead of the curve”, based on old experience, other people’s experience, negative expectations and other “suddenly”. Let me give you an example, so to speak, from real life.

The girl tries “just in case” (because she already had such a negative experience) to provide for all the options for the situation “my partner might cheat on me.”

To do this, the following actions are taken: the purposeful survival of friends of the opposite sex from the partner’s environment is carried out, his mail is checked, social media, telephone (depending on what is more accessible).

Restless and unnecessary body movements occur, for example, calling for no reason (because this is the fifth time in a day, and it’s difficult to come up with a reason), attempts to constantly “be there”, dictated by the fear of leaving him alone, coming up with some, in the girl’s opinion, “ inflammatory" situations (for example, provocations to jealousy on her part, which most often degenerates into banal hassle), etc.

All this is designed to help avoid betrayal.

But in reality, the opposite result is achieved - the partner feels extremely limited, gets tired of the constant control and presence of another person, cannot relax, be alone with himself or communicate with friends the way he wants, is constantly forced to delve into provocations and waste his emotions for various “checks”. The result is that he leaves.

And now a simple question - where, in what reality did that girl live? Anywhere except today.

Partially - in the past, where she had negative experiences. Partially - in the future, about which she was visited only by fears and dark fantasies.

All this had nothing to do with reality, with being “here and now.” And it didn’t work out to live with real feelings for my partner. And sometimes you have to assume that they never existed. After all, what kind of love can we talk about if one does not feel any trust in the other?

If we’re talking about how to draw conclusions from the past, then first find out why there was betrayal in the relationship and how the responsibility of each of the participants was realized in that situation.

Only by realizing the extent of your responsibility (and not just the “guilt” of your partner) can you really draw conclusions. And the most reliable guarantee that the likelihood of betrayal will at least decrease can only be an understanding of what actions in the couple led to this. The actions of both, I emphasize.

But the reality of that girl could be based on the facts of today. And if there were no obvious signs of ambiguity, then in this particular relationship there was no reason to suspect infidelity. And perhaps the relationship would have developed in a different way.

Third

Being “here and now” you will be able to fully contact reality and learn a lot of new things about it. For example, you can spend weeks wondering “what he meant when he looked at me like that.”

If you, having caught the eye, immediately went into fantasies and assumptions, you flew into that very abstract plane, where there are a billion assumptions, theories, “on the one hand” and “on the other hand,” but not an ounce of truth about this reality.

If you continue to remain in Here and now, you can hear yours own feelings. And they will deepen and develop in contact with the reality of this view.

Perhaps you will immediately feel what is behind it. Perhaps here and now you will feel growing bewilderment, but it is this that will allow you to immediately ask what is behind the look. This way your interlocutor will understand that you feel him. And your contact at this level will continue to deepen - this is the skill live by feelings.

And if you go into the plane of abstractions, you will not be able to understand your feelings and will not have time to react. And you will be left day after day chewing on assumptions about what it could be, without getting one iota closer to reality.

Living with feelings: do they tell the truth?

I propose to conduct a simple experiment here and now. First at the level of sensations.

Run your hand over any surface and tell me what it is like? For example, soft, warm, fleecy. Do you have any doubts that this is really the case? Hardly. Your fingers transmit a very specific signal to your consciousness.

If someone comes and tells you that your warm and soft surface is actually cold, slippery and smooth - will you believe him? If, again, you don’t go into any abstractions, no. Perhaps you allow a person to have distortions in perception or a different perception - say, his fingers are hot and therefore the surface temperature really seems cooler to him than to you.

But there is no overall, “objective” truth in any relationship or in your life. Objective truth, if you can call it that, exists only at the level of the basic laws of nature and objects of the material world.

And sensations are the primary way through which we can learn something about the world. But for each person they are different to one degree or another. And there is no single standard of sensations for everyone. And, accordingly, the conclusions and conclusions drawn on their basis will differ even more for each person than the sensations themselves.

You have your “like” or “dislike”, and what you feel is your reality, which you can rely on. Here and now she is like that. Even if you decide that it is better not to express feelings in this situation, this is your right. But you can notice them. And draw the appropriate conclusions within yourself. Which will be your today's truth about your condition and the state of affairs around you.

To begin with, in any situation, try to pay attention to bodily sensations. Are you comfortable? Do you feel any tension? What do you think is its source? Where exactly is this sensation located in your body? What would you like to do with it?

This practice of listening to yourself may seem overwhelming at first. But over time, you will become much faster at determining what is happening to you at the moment. And this knowledge about yourself will become so obvious over time that for you there will no longer be a question - can what I feel be considered true and is it possible to live by feelings?

Moreover, your sensations will become more vivid. Remember all the most powerful moments of your life. What are they connected to? With feelings. Even if the event was related to receiving important information– she evoked feelings.

And “thinking” and fantasies in the same circle only cause regrets about wasted time and the fact that fantasies have not yet been given the chance to become reality. But how can something become a reality if you don’t actually try to do it, but just think about it in your head?

Living with feelings is living in reality

I often hear the following statement: “What difference does it make whether the brain receives stimulation from fantasy or reality? After all, the sensations can be the same!”

Imagine, for example, how here and now you are waving your arms. Imagine this for 2-3 minutes. Are you tired? Do you feel a pleasant muscle stretch? Has your heart rate increased? Is the tension gone?

Now try waving your arms in reality for the same 2-3 minutes. Even if in the first case you had a certain increase in heart rate, a certain semblance of tension and relaxation, the contrast with reality will still be striking.

Yes, we can create emotions through fantasies and imaginations. And this mechanism itself helps a person, for example, to “get excited” about an idea, and then begin to implement it. But for some reason, most people do not enjoy living solely in their fantasies.

And here everything is simple - while we live in our body, we somehow form a common whole with it. The mind, feelings and body are all our reality, and separating one from the other and the third is fraught with at least a loss of the acuity of sensations and general dissatisfaction.

In a state of here and now, we are usually collected. At least to a greater extent than usual. We feel our body, we are aware of our feelings, which are directly related to our sensations, and the mind is ready for analytical work if necessary.

It’s unlikely that you want to experience love without physical contact, a trip to the sea only on TV, communication with friends only through text on the Internet, and playing sports only through photographs. Can you live in books all the time? And will such a life suit you?

The majority unequivocally says “no.”

But when it comes to saying goodbye to their beliefs and judgments about the world, albeit based on experience, but preventing further progress, and admit that the present may differ from the past - the majority, however, choose to continue to exist “in their heads.” ”, missing over and over again new opportunities to live with feelings in reality.

And he waves his arms solely in his imagination, hoping that such an action will help strengthen his arm muscles.

Statistics - the new religion

Separately, this phenomenon “helps” a person never come to his senses. Statistics was intended, in fact, to examine trends in order to change something or draw conclusions. However, for some reason the majority perceive it as a new form of doctrine.

The entire Internet is filled with jokes about British scientists, however, joking about the notorious figure of speech, many continue to sincerely believe that they are determined by statistics.

Here’s a paradox: statistics has always been a study of the existing state of affairs. As in economics, demand initially gave rise to supply. And then it happened that supply began to shape demand. And statistics began to dictate to many how they should behave and what would happen to them.

I just don’t hear any statements based on this new form religions:

- I won’t be able to get married, because according to statistics there are fewer men than women by so many percent, and according to the same statistics, at the age of 30, most of them are married...

- I won’t find a good job for myself, because according to statistics, specialists of my profile are in demand only in such and such a segment, and it only makes up so many percent of the total number of places, and in another, according to market research, slightly different qualities of applicants are needed, which I don't have...

- I will not be able to improve my health, because for the majority, according to statistics and the opinion of doctors, this disease is incurable...

What does all this have to do with you? Why did you classify yourself as part of some faceless group of people? Who collected these statistics? Does it accurately reflect the real state of affairs? And even if it does reflect it, it was there and then, but here and now you yourself can create new statistical trends.

Statistics don't say anything. She doesn't predict. It only explores existing trends. And she cannot predict for you personally, in your specific life, whether you will get married, whether you will improve your health, or whether you will find a job.

Interestingly, according to the same statistics, alcohol consumption per capita in Russia is growing catastrophically, while alcoholism is becoming younger, and mortality from it is increasing.

But for some reason, crowds of people who believe in statistics refuse alcohol, and every Friday, or even more often, they go to “drink the norm.” But for some reason this part of the statistics is ignored. Apparently, I don’t want to believe in her. But then why believe in other gloomy forecasts?

The point, of course, is that faith in statistics is sometimes poorly understood resistance. A person may have his own set of fears (dealing with health, getting married, or looking for a job), but he does not have enough knowledge or determination to isolate these fears and start working with them.

And then the following “excuse” is unconsciously chosen - “there are statistics!”, which, in fact, only justifies the lack of action to improve the situation.

But the simplest action that could be taken right here and now is to refuse to measure yourself by other people's standards. Yes, something happened to someone somewhere. And to be completely blind to what is happening around is unwise.

But what do you have to lose if you start looking for a husband, regardless of the statistics? What if you started trying the health systems available to you, despite what “most people think”? What if you go through interviews trying to find something you like, despite the fact that “British scientists”...?

And if you are afraid of losing time and acting without guarantees, then what are you spending your time on now, today? Perhaps if you start living with feelings, they will tell you how unsatisfactory your reality is for you. But perhaps this feeling will be the impetus for you to start doing something?

Reason or feelings? This question interests many people at different periods of their lives. Perhaps among your friends there are obvious supporters of one side or the other. What does it mean to live by reason or feeling? After all, we all, to one degree or another, think and feel and try to somehow “balance” these mystical components of life. But often people have to regret this or that choice. “It would be better if I thought carefully then and acted according to the situation,” “I never felt happy in these moments, I can’t enjoy life... I don’t feel anything.” Each of us grew up in a family where, to one degree or another, the cult of reason or feelings prevails. This, of course, leaves typos in our further actions. But what is best for our lives is up to us to decide. The experience of each of us has already pushed us to a certain decision. Did we make the right choice? What will be better for the way we live? How to reconcile reason and feelings and learn to live?

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Photo gallery: Should we replace feelings with reason?

Feelings

Here we have a girl who constantly steps on the same rake, makes the same mistakes, but is content with every happy minute and enjoys life. It seems to you that she seems to be “living and breathing deeply”, enjoying every wonderful minute and that she is doing everything right, that this is how she should act. We see her happy with her new chosen one, how she glows from the inside. Romance at every step, enthusiasm and dreams. But when her heart is broken again, you think: how stupid it all looks from the outside. Why is she suffering so much? Why can’t he pull himself together, because everyone does it, and it doesn’t seem so hard. The emotions on her face change one after another, she either suffers, then pulls herself together again. And when the next chance comes, he catches it with a strong grip.

Have you ever had a time when you acted against the expectations of others? Didn’t you listen to your parents, who constantly convinced you of a certain point of view, but you still did it your own way? Or when you went against your superiors, general rules, even just your requirements and plans? Because they wanted it that way? In each of these cases, you probably acted in accordance with your feelings. And perhaps even in half of these cases they regretted what they had done.

And although feelings often let us down, we still return to them again and again, making an impulse, a breakthrough, abandoning plans for the sake of our desires. We take risks, fall, rise and live again. This is human nature - to feel. And even if you choose to trust only your mind, it will be self-deception, because a person cannot live without feelings. No matter how reliable we are, no matter how we describe our plans and thoughts, each of us has our own weaknesses and “impulses.” Everyone needs to make mistakes sometimes, do crazy things in order to feel alive.

Feelings can be the choice of both a very weak and a very strong person. When feelings are the choice of a weak person - this is what torments us for many years. These are weaknesses, attachments that do not allow us to live. This is a wife who cannot leave her alcoholic husband due to attachment and confusion. These are many cases when feelings prevent us from making a very important choice, torment us, and complicate life. Feelings and emotions should not bring grief and suffering. If we choose feelings and suffer from this choice, then something is wrong.

At the same time, feelings can be the choice of a very strong person. Because when we trust our instincts, we trust ourselves. This is the choice of a self-confident person who lives in harmony with his inner world. Reason is often not our choice, but the choice of the environment, society, the choice that other people made before us and impose this opinion on us. Reason is often stereotypes that destroy feelings. A person who trusts his emotions is not mistaken in them. After all, the whole point of this choice is to not regret it later and to be completely confident in the correctness of the action taken. Feelings are chosen by individualists and strong personalities because they know how to express themselves and what to tell the world. After all, in the end, it is the feelings and ethics that make us human and fill our lives with meaning.

Intelligence

Man has his own “sins”, mistakes and doubts. The mind, at some point in life, throws a “lifeline” at each of us, saves us from tragedies, helps us comprehend the situation and even improve it. There are people who consider reason to be the main assistant in all life conflicts. After all, feelings often cloud decisions, pushing us towards selfishness and the shortcomings inherent in our nature. Feelings are the little selfish child in us who demands to fulfill his whims. The mind is an adult who from time to time must pacify the child inside. Moreover, planning and conscious decisions help us avoid many mistakes.

But if you plan everything ahead, sooner or later you can get burned. People who give decisions to their minds are more anxious, afraid of doing something wrong, losing, making mistakes. Trusting your “I” is often useful, as is listening to your inner whims. Another approach leads to stress, frustration and conflicts with oneself. When choosing reason, sooner or later you realize that a certain side of sensitivity and emotionality leaves you and you are no longer capable of experiences and vivid emotions. Now, in beautiful and pleasant situations, reason and analysis come to the rescue. And so he tells us: “Everything is good, everything is wonderful. But why do I feel so little?

Harmony within us

Of course, no one can choose only one method - to live by reason or feelings. We understand that in different situations it is worth listening to each of these sides. And perhaps they are not even as militant as we think? When to choose reason and when to choose feelings? In fact, these are not such warring parties. With experience comes harmony, and with harmony comes right decisions, which will help you combine the responses of each of these parties, weigh your impulses and desires, but also analyze situations and give due credit to the situation. Intuition will tell us when to listen to which side. And even if we make mistakes, and others criticize us, the main thing is personal choice. You should not be afraid of new methods and solutions, you need to be confident in your choice, not conflict with yourself and trust your heart or mind. It is better to learn from your mistakes than to listen to the advice of others.