Many men, no matter how much they are dissuaded by more experienced relatives and friends, still try to build their relationships with women who are not suitable for family relationships - divorced women with children.
In most cases, such relationships end in logical separation. And there are many reasons for this.
Someone will say that there are examples of similar long term relationship, but as a rule they are all exceptions to the disappointing rules.
Let's look at the reasons for the transformation of an ordinary young girl into a woman with a child unsuitable for creating any kind of family relationship. The whole point lies in the very nature of female upbringing.
Before crossing the threshold of the registry office, a young, foolish individual must realize what she actually faces after the divorce from a man, expected by every fiber of her soul. Perhaps she will be left alone, or even with the children, and will already agree to do anything just to somehow feed herself and her children.
This is where the most important thing begins.
Having secured a sweet man for herself and having children for him, the girl immediately gets a divorce in order to sue for everything - from lifelong alimony to shares in Gazprom with a view of the Cote d'Azur. But after the long-awaited divorce, many girls face enchanting disappointment, comparable in its strength to pretentious bewilderment. After a divorce, no one needs a woman with baggage, especially her ex-husband. For what to a normal guy ex-girlfriend? Why does a man need a woman with luggage?
Men are creatures, scoundrels, scoundrels and terrible owners, for whom one of the most important criteria in life is the notorious rule - “my wife is my property, not someone else’s, period,” and children are not always an exception to this.
Alas, in our modern world mired in lack of culture and economic confusion, where the institution of marriage and family was completely and irrevocably lost in the distant Soviet years, marriage is just part of a divorce, and the birth of a child is a bargaining chip - such a strange phenomenon as marriage to a woman with a child often happens . And this is where many underground schools arise, which psychologists around the world do not even know how to characterize, except for one word - horror.
Alas, we must admit that by entering into such a relationship, a man does not create his own family, but only joins, in birdlike rights, terrible for male psychological perception, to an already existing single-parent family, the family of a woman with a child and an ex-husband, who logically has at least some then, but still communication with your children, even if by law they no longer live in a single happy society, capable, in a favorable situation, of raising MENTALLY COMPLETE members of society.
Of course, children in the marriage of divorced parents automatically become inferior, and unfortunately, the trauma of such a marriage affects the child’s future life in a negative way, like the mark of an inferior family for the rest of his life.
And when a stranger ties himself to a woman who has children from a previous marriage, many problems are created.
Someone else's child is a time bomb that, sooner or later, will explode, and then it will become bad, and for everyone at once. The reason for all this is a pedagogical impasse, which consists in the fact that it is simply unrealistic to apply the advanced method of raising children in the family when the child feels and knows that close person his mother is not his natural father.
In addition, in relation to her dear child, a woman will not allow any criticism, much less punishment or educational actions on the part of her new spouse, and for a child - a stepfather, even if other methods of influence on a spoiled lazy child simply do not work.
It is not difficult to imagine what kind of psychological trauma a child experiences in such a union - when his beloved only mother lives with a stranger whom he must love and respect while the child has a real beloved and natural father, who does not live with them for reasons unknown to the child.
In especially advanced cases, even a verbal instruction to a child is perceived by a woman as an attempt to put physical and psychological pressure on the woman’s only natural child.
In turn, the biological father, no matter how bad this expression may sound, will be clearly against such an execution of his own child by his next lover ex-wife, who brought a man into the house of a stranger and stranger to their joint child. In such a relationship with a divorced woman with a child, the biological father will periodically emerge in the role of an extremely positive character - a Sunday dad, against the background of which the negligent and hateful would-be teacher will look like a monster, tormentor and tyrant to the child.
In a situation where a man who has created a relationship with a divorced woman with a child will tactically distance himself from the educational functions of someone else’s child, not his own, so as not to run into inappropriate criticism from the divorced woman and even the child’s biological father, he automatically becomes a negligent man who do not love women and children, even if the children are not his own.
It turns out to be a catastrophic vicious circle, from which there is simply no way out for a man who has created a relationship with a divorced woman with a child...
A complete collection of materials on the topic: the psychology of a divorced woman with a child from experts in their field.
A divorced woman with a child, also known as RSP, or “divorcee with a trailer”, is a natural consequence of the matriarchal upbringing of men in the spirit of duty and responsibility to women.
One could even say that most divorces these days are a means of getting rid of compliant and friendly men, who are disadvantageous for women who are again moving to the stage of searching for a new partner to replace the old one who did not live up to her expectations. However, such an attempt to do everything anew can a priori be considered flawed, because the chances of a girl who does not have children and a divorced woman with a child cannot be equal from the very beginning.
However, as practice shows, divorcees with a “trailer” often find relatively worthy men and create their second families with them. Having asked ourselves the question of finding out how comfortable relationships with women with other people’s children are for men, we will try to analyze them as objectively as possible in this article.
So, as we have already noted, a woman who left her former family union of her own free will, has one or more children from her former husband, who often disappears from her personal life purely conditionally, continuing to communicate with her and her child for an unlimited time. Any man who dates such a “divorcee” must take this fact into account, namely, that her “ex” will one way or another be constantly present in her life, regardless of whether this suits her current gentleman or not.
The very fact of inclusion in a possible family life two foreign entities at once, her ex-husband and someone else's child - does not initially add optimism to all her possible gentlemen, as a result of which she loses one suitor after another.
In order to achieve what she wants, that is, to start her personal life anew, she has to use an order of magnitude more resources to retain the potential partner she likes. As a result, she can already be much more proactive at the very beginning than the man she has chosen.
In particular, she is ready to use all her most attractive qualities to keep him. This may be almost complete permissiveness for him in terms of sex, as well as indispensable for someone who has already been in family relationships attributes of home comfort: cleanliness and order in the house, delicious dinner and so important for all men at the end of each working day, the desire to be listened to and encouraged.
Any other woman is not always able to activate similar traits in herself, therefore, at the stage of courtship, a divorcee with a “trailer” becomes for a man a kind of storehouse of worldly wisdom, care, purely feminine attention and understanding. Of course, all these points have great importance for his further choice of her as a permanent partner, as well as for his future wife.
However, we have every reason to believe that all these traits, i.e. care, affection, attention, understanding and other similar things, are characteristic of divorced women only early stages relationships, when she still needs to captivate the man she has chosen and keep him near her.
Such “correctness” cannot last forever, for why then did she not want to keep her former family in the same way? Consequently, this woman already has a priori insincere behavior when she simply achieves a pre-set goal, for example, to start a family with this man or to start with him Cohabitation. As soon as this goal is achieved, the divorcee can either immediately become herself, her former self, or she can only periodically support the man’s opinion of herself as a caring and loving woman by repeating the techniques of retaining him that she had already tested on him at the very beginning.
Eating food at the beginning of the day activates the entire body and provides it with a boost of energy for the whole day. Therefore, you definitely need to eat in the morning.
The first mistake of the beginning of the day is to refuse the morning meal or eat something wrong, for example, scrambled eggs or a sandwich. How many people recognized themselves? This means something needs to be changed.
To figure out what to eat for breakfast with proper nutrition, you need to remember the main thing: don’t skip breakfast, don’t overeat and forget about unhealthy foods.
Let's figure out why the first meal is so beneficial. When you wake up, you may not want to eat. But this does not mean that the body does not require it. During sleep, the processes occurring inside you do not stop and during the night they consume the remaining energy that needs to be replenished in the morning.
Beneficial properties of early nutrition:
Scientists have noticed that eating the right food in the morning increases attention, concentration and mental abilities. This is a very important condition for a productive working day.
It is in the morning that you set the mood for the whole day, and the body feels it. From 7.00 to 9.00 enzymes important for digestion are produced.
If you skip breakfast, the enzymes will simply “burn out” and will not produce any benefits. desired benefit. This will lead to disruptions in organ function and decreased immunity. Eating in the morning reduced the risk of catching a cold.
Let's say you decide to sleep longer instead of standing at the stove at dawn. At the same time, we had a hearty dinner, hoping that this would be enough for the next morning.
What will happen to your body during the night and the next day:
Neglecting morning appointment food, you disrupt the coordinated operation of the entire “mechanism,” which in the future may cause it to fail.
Breakfast with proper nutrition must contain proteins, fiber and complex carbohydrates. They launch digestive process and promote a long-lasting feeling of fullness.
The most healthy foods in the morning:
Most often, breakfast is accompanied by coffee. Tea lovers should prefer green to black. It contains antioxidants that are beneficial for health.
For those who can't give up coffee, don't worry. The main thing is not to drink more than one medium mug.
And it’s right to drink fresh juices only after meals! And if the first ones are simply useless on an empty stomach, then the second ones irritate an empty stomach. They are not only a separate dish, but also a drink. It should not be thick and not burden the stomach. It is good to dilute fruit with juice or water.
With proper nutrition, there are also prohibitions. In order not to harm the body in the morning, nutritionists advise avoiding consumption in the morning:
All these foods eaten at breakfast are enemies proper nutrition. They will not bring anything useful except fat deposits and improper digestion.
Perfect breakfast- This is, first of all, a healthy and nutritious breakfast. But this is not enough.
You need to prepare yourself for eating:
If you have previously neglected breakfast and cannot start eating right away, get used to it gradually. Start with a healthy sandwich and drink. Gradually add eggs, natural yoghurts, and small portions of porridge to your diet. The body will gradually get used to it and begin to demand breakfast on its own.
Let's look at each type in more detail.
A protein diet is primarily required for those who have heavy physical work or simply active image life.
Squirrels- these are additional calories, but with the condition that they need to be spent. A classic source of protein is eggs. Just boil or make an omelet? Who likes it how?
You can add vegetables or meat to the omelette. To avoid running out of carbohydrates, simply eat with a slice of bread.
Which is better to choose:
Having a proper carbohydrate breakfast is also easy.
The best source of carbohydrates is porridge. It doesn’t matter which one you choose: oatmeal, rice, buckwheat or any other.
But the best option- cook with water. Carbohydrates contain sweets and. But these are the main enemies of the figure. They do not provide proper saturation. That's why we eat only whole grains for breakfast.
Carbohydrate foods are suitable for those who engage in mental work and do not expend much physical effort.
Suitable recipes:
in one meal is ideal option. Protein will provide energy and carbohydrates will provide strength for intellectual work.
The main condition is the absence of fat. You can safely combine porridge, cottage cheese, kefir, egg whites, bran, and whole grain bread in equal proportions. Do not exclude vegetables and fruits.
By choosing the right foods from the list for proper nutrition for your lifestyle, your weight will remain normal. In this breakfast you can combine dishes from both types. The main thing is to reduce portions.
To lose weight, you don't have to starve. Low-calorie breakfasts are easy and tasty.
Calorie content– this is the energy that is formed during the digestion of foods in the body. The heavier the food, the more difficult the digestion process.
Best low calorie breakfast- This is low-fat cottage cheese with the addition of fruits and berries. Suitable fish (pike perch, cod, carp), vegetables (carrots, cucumbers, tomatoes, pumpkin).
It is better to cook small portions. But don’t overdo it, because you want to avoid going hungry in pursuit of a diet.
Worth a try:
Poor nutrition is the first cause of rapid hunger. There are foods that do not satisfy, but increase hunger. They are quickly digested, raising blood sugar levels. Because of this, a person very quickly begins to feel the need for food. This is a direct path to overeating.
Such “insidious” products include:
But sometimes hunger returns even after eating porridge for breakfast. It seems that she shouldn't let her down like that. What's going on? It's mostly a matter of portion or taste preferences.
If you eat “empty” cereal, boiled in water, the saturation from it will not last long. You can add nuts, berries or fruits. It's both tastier and more satisfying. Small portions also won't keep you hungry for long. You need to avoid crossing the line between satiation and overeating.
Less often, the quickly returning feeling of hunger has nothing to do with food. In this way, the body can signal a lack of important microelements.
Despite the diversity healthy food, porridge remains the most popular breakfast. When you hear the phrase “proper nutrition,” the first thing that comes to mind is oatmeal.
Tips for cooking porridge:
There is no single list of the right breakfast. All people have different organisms, lifestyles and taste preferences.
All recipes below are for 4 servings.
The recipe is simple and cheap, and the benefits are enormous. This breakfast will leave you with a light stomach.
The easiest preparation option:
Everyone’s favorite porridge since childhood is very simple to cook:
Buten porridge prepared in this way is tender and aromatic, and most importantly, both children and adults will like it.
“Empty” scrambled eggs are no longer interesting to anyone and everyone knows the recipe for making them. Therefore, we will cook scrambled eggs with tomatoes and green onions.
Another way to get your morning dose of protein. It can be made light with vegetables or baked without additives. Then it will be fluffy and it will be a pleasure to eat.
A hearty recipe is an omelette with chicken and mozzarella:
Good combination of calcium and vitamins. And if you bake apples in the oven, it will turn out delicious dessert, which is a complete breakfast, but which can also be served as an afternoon snack.
The secret of delicious cheesecakes is low-fat cottage cheese. The dough from it should be homogeneous and keep its shape. You can get creative with the filling and add nuts, cinnamon, berries, potatoes.
The classic recipe remains unchanged:
This vegetable goes well with cereals. Therefore, a good breakfast would be millet porridge with pumpkin.
Do you consider sandwiches unhealthy food? You just don't know how to cook them correctly. Only everyone's favorite bread and sausage are harmful.
Besides this there are many healthy recipes and ideas:
According to scientists, proper breakfast for children must consist of at least four ingredients: bread, corn flakes, milk or yogurt, fresh fruits or vegetables, fruit tea without sugar or juice.
The main thing is to follow three rules of a proper breakfast for losing weight:
All the same products are prohibited as during healthy eating. The main diet aid is rolled oats and buckwheat. We do not add sugar, honey and nuts to the porridge, but replace them with fruit. We choose fermented milk products with less fat content (but not low-fat!).
Light meals include all kinds of salads. In this case, be careful with the oil dressing. Many people forget that it is very high in calories. It is better to use low-fat yogurt. Smoothies are another solution for losing weight. You can combine fruits, vegetables and juices to suit every taste without worrying about calories.
In order for a proper breakfast to also become a dietary one, you need to change not only your diet:
If you have been following a healthy diet before, following a diet at breakfast will not be difficult.
A proper breakfast is not difficult. It can and should be tasty. The main thing is to train yourself not to miss it. What you eat is your choice. Cook porridge more often, replace sugar with honey or fruit, drink water, do not overuse coffee and flour. And always stay in a good mood!
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